A priest, a Baptist preacher and a Rabbi all served as
chaplains to the students of the University of Alabama
in Tuscaloosa. They would get together two or three
times a week for coffee and to talk shop.
One day, someone made the comment that preaching
to people isn't really all that hard. A real challenge would
be to preach to a bear. One thing led to another and they
decided to do an experiment. They would all go up to
the Smokies, find a bear, preach to it, and attempt to
convert it.
Seven days later, they're all together to discuss the
experience.
Father Flannery, who has his arm in a sling, is on crutches,
and has various bandages on his body and limbs, went first.
"Well," he said, "I went into the woods to find me a bear.
And when I found him I began to read to him from the
Catechism. Well, that bear wanted nothing to do with me
and began to slap me around. So, I quickly grabbed my
holy water, sprinkled him and said, 'Holy Mary Mother of
God', he became as gentle a lamb. The bishop is coming
out next week to give him first communion and confirmation."
Reverend Billy Bob spoke next. He was in a wheelchair,
with an arm and both legs in casts, and an IV drip. In his best
fire and brimstone oratory he claimed, "WELL brothers, you
KNOW that WE don't sprinkle! I went out and I FOUND
me a bear. And then I began to read to my bear from God's
HOLY WORD! But that bear wanted nothing to do with me.
So I took HOLD of him and we began to wrestle. We
wrestled down one hill, UP another and DOWN another
until we came to a creek. So right quick-like, I DUNKED
him and BAPTIZED his hairy soul. And just like you said,
he became as gentle as a lamb. We spent the rest of the day
praising Jesus."
They both looked down at the rabbi, who was lying in a
hospital bed. He was in a body cast and traction with IV's
and monitors running in and out of him. He was in bad shape.
The rabbi looks up and says, "Looking back on it, circumcision
may not have been the best way to start."
