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-   -   This girl I like has a boyfriend (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=249684)

  • Aug 16, 2008, 08:12 PM
    bladerunner21
    This girl I like has a boyfriend
    Hello,
    I was jogging the other day and ran into an attractive girl.
    We stopped and said hi and both complimented each other.
    It turns out she lives right down the street.
    She gave me her # and said she wanted to work out with me.
    She came over twice so far and all we did was talk and work out at my place.
    I asked about her boyfriend and she said they have been dating for 3 years.
    She knows one of my friends so I asked her if she wanted to go bowling with me, her friends boyfriend and our friend. She said I would but I don't think my boyfriend would like that idea too much. She came over again yesterday to work out.
    She said she wants to come over in a few days after 10pm to work out and then maybe watch a movie. I don't push anything on her and I don't want to be that guy but I feel a connection. What should I do? I really enjoy her company. She also said she wants a massage sometime because I took classes for it.
    Thanks
  • Aug 16, 2008, 09:21 PM
    ChihuahuaMomma
    Do you really want to date someone that would give their number to a stranger that stops them and says they're pretty? Seriously? This friendship is okay, unless it doesn't go further. I'm sure her boyfriend would not like the idea of her working out at your place. Especially at 10pm and then watching a movie together. Whether the intent is there, this could be miscontrued as a date to her boyfriend. Has she told her boyfriend that the two of you are hanging out? If so, does he approve? If not, there is a reason she's hiding it.
  • Aug 16, 2008, 09:28 PM
    bladerunner21
    I don't know if she told him she's working out at my place... And I should clear things up... We weren't total strangers. My sister hangs out with her sister A lot and we have a mutual friend that lives down the road. A week ago was the first time we met.
    We ran 2 miles and walked amile and talked though before she gave me her #
  • Aug 16, 2008, 09:32 PM
    ChihuahuaMomma
    Regardless, she has a boyfriend and she gave another guy her number. In my book, that's emotional cheating.

    Would you trust her in a relationship?
  • Aug 16, 2008, 09:36 PM
    bladerunner21
    I don't know, I personally don't know her well enough... My friend said she never cheated on her boyfriend in 3 years... so I don't know.
    Maybe she's not even interested in me at all and just wants to come over and work out?
    Couldn't that be a possibility?
  • Aug 16, 2008, 09:38 PM
    ChihuahuaMomma
    It could, yes. But is it appropriate? That's my question. I'm not implying that you would do anything with a girl that has a boyfriend. And I'm not implying that she would cheat on her boyfriend or that she has, but she is definitely taking steps that way.
  • Aug 16, 2008, 09:47 PM
    bladerunner21
    Yeah, I totally understand... I just don't know what to do... I really like her and we have fun together... It's a rough situation
  • Aug 16, 2008, 09:50 PM
    ChihuahuaMomma
    Just be a friend, don't make a move, reject her if she makes a move. Don't invite her over after 8pm, and make your stance clear. "We are just friends, you have a boyfriend, and I don't want to interfere with that."

    Now, if on her own she decides her current relationship isn't what she could have with you then that's a different story. But until then remain friends, and draw the line where appropriate.
  • Aug 16, 2008, 10:12 PM
    pinkcelly123
    Stay away she is trouble.. 1 you don't know her and 2 she has a boyfriend of 3 years Truthfully if I was you I wouldn't even work out with her because your just going to get mixed feelings and signals about everything she has a boyfriend and yet she gave you her number wants to work out at night and watch a movie that doesn't even make scents on her part because she does that but won't go bowling MIXED MESSAGES I TELL YA.. the connection is purely physical you like the way she looks and she is nice obviously she thinks the same as you but.. this could only get worse the boyfriend getting jealous she breaking your heart saying this was a bad idea from the start predictable scenarios all could happen
  • Aug 17, 2008, 08:42 PM
    talaniman
    It's a red flag when a female with a boyfriend, starts to get closer, and closer. Just because know one knows what she does after dark, doesn't mean she doesn't cheat.
    What if she charms you into a free massage and while you work on her, she gets you thinking about having more, and she leaves. That's a teaser right.

    Either way save yourself the misery, and pain, and humiliation, and back away before she breaks your naïve heart. To many thing to go wrong, and I hope you see that.

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