What to do when you have a fetish?
I have a fetish that I don't really know how to address. But the fetish is really cramping my style. I want to be a normal college girl. Date guys. Maybe mess around on occasions. Gush about how cute that guy is over there. But I'm just not attracted to the type of guy that the rest of the world sees as attractive. I hate young. I hate athletic builds. I hate 6 packs. I hate short men. I hate full heads of hair. I hate thin and I HATE circumcision (It just looks unnatural). I'm just not attracted to men with those features. I like older men. Mid 40's to mid 50's. Beer bellies. Receding hairlines. Thick arms and legs. Perverted men. Men with body hair. Thick necks. Small penises (they look better to me). I see THEM as sexy. And I just don't know how to be normal like my friends.
They'll talk about that football player that won the game and took off his shirt and swung it around and I'll be thinking about truckers. At night I think about these types of men and it's the only thing that gets me going (if you know what I mean). Nothing else turns me on. But I know I have no future with these types of men. My family would never accept it and I know that a relationship wouldn't work with these types of men. By the time I'm ready to start a family, they'd be ready to retire (if they already haven't) and not worry about anyone but themselves. On the other hand, I wouldn't be happy with a guy my age with those physical characteristics I dislike. I wouldn't be sexually attracted to him and sex would be weird if I wasn't turned on at ALL by him. I have quite a few guy friends and some of them are thick in the middle. I try to tell them that they look great but they just keep telling me that they need to go to the gym or lose weight or bring back their six packs. It makes me sick. And they are even more paranoid about going bald. I tell them that it's okay but they don't believe me. Guys my age are just too focused looking like the latest celebrity.
I just don't know what to do. If I wait until I'm 40 to find an older gentlemen for me then it'll be too late to have kids. I don't want to be in my 60 (or older) by the time my kids graduate high school. I just want to be normal. But young guys these days are trying to be the very thing I hate. They work out. They grow out their hair. They shave their chests and legs. They are circumcised. And some even take pills that claim to make their penises bigger. I don't want that. So how do I solve this issue? How do I become normal like my friends? Because I really feel like this fetish is holding me back from having a normal, fun, college experience.