Well everyone I am here for the same reason as everyone else but yet I can not help myself from posting here to get some one on one advice from people that have experienced this or from the "experts" on these situations. Here is my story. Any advice is appreciated! :)

About 1 month ago my girlfriend was asked out bye a guy she works with and she said no because we were currently dating. She came hold and told me and I basically said well that's cool because how am I supposed to react to that? Anyway about a week later I was at her house and I saw her texting and I just happened to ask who she was texting and she said that guy that asked her out so I was just kind of like OK... Well then there was this party for work at one of her managers house for the department that she works in and she asked him if he wanted to come and gave him directions to the party... I did not say anything about it because I just thought of them as friends. Then I went to my grandmas and while I was away I found out that she went to his house for a party also.. I also found out that while at the party he was touching her feet (which she hates) but told him that she like it. So I confronted her and asked her what he meant to her and she said they were "just friends" well about a week later she broke up with me. Her reasons were because I am going to be going off to college about 2000 miles away from her and she is scared and worried that I will do something with someone else even though I have told her I wanted to propose to her and such. She also said that she needed to find out who she was as a person and wanted to be able to focus on school and not have to worry about who I am with and such. It hurt because we broke up but I understood in a way where she was coming from.

After that we went to Florida for a week with her family for vacation as we were separated and she kept getting sad that this guy was not texting her. I also felt like every time he did text her she kept trying to hide it from me so I did one of the worst things I could... I looked through her phone to find out what was being said and it said things like "I miss you" and "I wish you were here" so then I got upset again and confronted her on it because I felt like she wanted him there more than me and she said no "WE ARE JUST FRIENDS" and I believed her and just went on with it and had a great rest of the vacation. So now it has been about 2 weeks since we have gotten back from vacation and I find out 4 days ago that she is going out with this guy that she was "Just friends with" and of course I got mad at that because she said she did not want a boyfriend going into college because she did not want to worry and because she is already dating someone else.

Well all this time I have still been talking to her and have been trying to stay friends with her because she says she really needs me in her life. (I KNOW NOT SMART) and when we were on vacation we even fooled around with each other so I have been pretty accessible to her in talking. She also told me she would hope I would wait around for her and not date people in Florida because when she finds out what she wants she will be back. I told her now that she has a boyfriend that I just feel like a rebound man now but she keeps telling me to wait and she is dating him to make sure "I am the ONE". She also keeps telling me she loves me to death though and I asked her the other day out of 10 how much she liked me and she said 9... even though she had a boyfriend... and she also said she would love to have sex with me still but can't because of her new boyfriend...

Another thing that is making this so hard is that I leave for college in 4 days and I would love to be friends with her later on in life but I feel if I just leave her completely alone she will say fine I don't need you and just will want nothing to do with me anymore.

PLEASE HELP! Lol I have not given her time to realize what she has lost really I guess and says because I have kept trying to get back with her that I am just making her more confused. Lol

Thanks for the time in reading this super long post but I wanted to get as many details as I could. Thanks for any help you can give me but I am sure I know what is coming...

Whoa.. I stopped reading when she gave you the line "I'm just dating him to make sure you're the one" Please tell me you aren't buying that load of sh!t. Cut all contact with her, and if you decide to wait around for her, go grab some scissors and cut off your b@lls and hand them to her! I know it's harsh but she already has them, might as well hand them over. Go no contact and heal, find better! And you will... here is a great motivational quote

Can I just say one more thing?
I'm not going to say you know, there's plenty more fish in the sea
I'm not going to say if you love her let her go
And I'm not going to bombard you with cliche's
But what I will say is this:
It's not the end of the world

Well the line was more like "I needed to do something to make sure your the one" because about 8 months earlier I broke up with her because I did not think I felt the same way about her and I started semi seeing this new girls and she got really hurt by that. But because of that experience I noticed how much I loved her and wanted to be with her for the rest of my life. Now she is using it against me saying you really hurt me back then what makes me think you won't do it again... and also saying you got the chance to make sure I was the one so now it is my turn.


Bye the way should I edit my post with less details?

No, around here at the AMHD we LOVE details. It allows us to better give advice to you knowing the whole situation.

You both are facing growing pains, as you move from kids, to young adults, and you both have different obligations, and goals to work for, so end this as friends, but cut contact, to get over each other. That stops the games, drama, and confusion, the end of young love brings, and you can have a clean, friendly break.

Important to not put more dependence on her friendship, as you would any other friend, as this will only delay the healing process, and give you false hope and unrealistic expectations. This causes a lot of assumptions, not based in facts, and insecurities, and hard feelings toward each other, that will drive you both crazy.

Sorry, but accept that you both have your own things in life to do, and let each other go, gracefully.

Another question I have that I saw in another post is if she could be scared of being alone and this is why she did it. I mean it was a year and a half relationship and she told me many times that she wanted to marry me and such but ever since the relationship came down to a month away she has sprang all this stuff. I know I will need to move on but I am just trying to understand if it's a scared thing or if it was more this guy...

If I had a dollar for every girl that said she wanted to marry me... Well I'd only have 4 bucks.. But that's how many relationships I have been in. My high school girlfriend at 15 said she wanted to marry me, have my kid and all that hoopla. Then a girl I dated for 2 months said she loved me and wanted to spend forever with me(broke up with her because she was pyscho) and then my ex I just went through a break up also wanted to marry me.

Saying you want to marry someone is par for the course anymore. Everyone says it

Haha yea I know... well now I am ignoring her and she is trying to text me and it sounds like she is getting mad or disapointed I am not texting back. The only thing is I feel I have to talk to her before I leave for college in 4 days so it won't last super long.

You don't have to talk to her before you leave. Leave for college and enjoy your freedom!

Yea but if I do that she will never want to talk to me again and down the road I would still like to call her a friend at the very least...

Your going to college, there will be many new friends and the old ones will be left behind until later in life anyway. Why would you expect her friendship in the future, to be any different than anyone else who you leave behind??

You never know when you'll ever see her again, let it go. For you both.