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-   -   People seriously think I'm ugly (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=247552)

  • Aug 10, 2008, 06:33 PM
    plutogirl
    People seriously think Im ugly
    I didn't know where to put this but I was a teen at the time so put it in this subforum. Im 20 years old in USA and when I was 18 in a sixth form Biology class of 31 students we were on the topic of natural selection and attraction and the teacher decided to do like a experiment where the class anonymously rated each other out of 10 on how facialy attractive they are. We were all given the option to opt out but everyone else said yes so I did too, plus I wanted to know how attractive I was lol. Anyway I got the lowest score of 4.3 out of 10 all of the other girls got 6's 7's and 8's. The person who was second last got 5.8 so I was shocked to discover their opinions I thought I was all right looking and still do but can't understand why others think Im ugly. Even the 40 odd year old teacher got 6.1 out of 10! I never attract guys or get male attention so I musn't be attractive I must have too much confidence. I know I sound stupid and there are bigger problems in the world but I still get upset at this, Ive never been fat always been very slim, petite and worked out a lot. Id known the kids in my class for 2 years but didn't know they thought I was ugly, how would you cope with being the ugliest in the class? Its not even as though its me being paranoid or that they are bullies, it has been revealed in a friendly way.
  • Aug 10, 2008, 06:40 PM
    N0help4u
    I can't imagine why in the world any teacher would do that. I would want to report her.
    Also don't let it get you down. What others think isn't the end all be all. I don't think I am all that good looking probably a 4.5 and I think that quality of life you live is more important than shallowness people often base things on.
  • Aug 10, 2008, 06:44 PM
    plutogirl
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by N0help4u
    I can't imagine why in the world any teacher would do that. I would want to report her.
    Also don't let it get you down. What others think isn't the end all be all. I don't think I am all that good looking probably a 4.5 and I think that quality of life you live is more important than shallowness people often base things on.

    Thanks, the teacher was male he was one of those fun loving types and I think he just wanted a rating himself. Can't believe I got lower than the teacher!
  • Aug 10, 2008, 06:49 PM
    Fr_Chuck
    Teacher should be fired

    But OK, funniest thing, 15 years after graduation, you return and find all of the cheer leaders fat and with 4 kids married to the guy that works at the gas station or the plumber since they ended up marring the jock who did not get that foot ball scholarship and went to work in town.

    The plain girls ended up going to college, finding a new way to dress and act and the majority were the "hot" girls or they ended up being the engineers making 200,000 a year.

    But often high school kids rate girls on size of breasts and how tight the clothes are. Even "looks" is still judged in high school with how popular you are, not really on looks.

    But so you need a make over? Ever watch those make over shows on TV, you get your hair styled, you learn now make up ideas and change the way you wear some clothers
  • Aug 10, 2008, 06:51 PM
    ChihuahuaMomma
    Why the hell would you care what an obviously self-centered teacher thinks or the children that he tries to brain-wash?

    That is just ridiculous, and not at all an okay experiment for class.

    And there is no such thing as too much confidence, well you know actually there is, it's called cocky. But who cares, if you like the way you look and are confident in your skin then that's awesome.
  • Aug 10, 2008, 06:51 PM
    N0help4u
    I agree with Fr_Chuck exactly what I meant by quality vs shallowness.
  • Aug 10, 2008, 06:52 PM
    ChihuahuaMomma
    I'm going to have to disagree with Chuck on this one... DON'T change who you are or what you look like just to please others. Be you, and you'll find the one that cares about that.
  • Aug 10, 2008, 06:53 PM
    N0help4u
    Fr_Chuck wasn't saying for her to change WHO she is.
  • Aug 10, 2008, 06:54 PM
    ChihuahuaMomma
    How she looks is who she is... why should she change that to please others?
  • Aug 10, 2008, 06:58 PM
    plutogirl
    Yea but it was based up on facial attractiveness not clothing, though I was wearing sports clothes and a baseball cap. At the time my mum kept saying how no guys want to go out with me as I don't bother with myself, my aunty agreed. I did wear make up, tight jeans etc and tried to look good but hated wearing tight tops as my arms are really skinny. Yet Ive always thought I have a nice face even though I look really young, usually it's the opposite way round you know really attractive girls who get guys still saying they are ugly.
  • Aug 10, 2008, 06:58 PM
    N0help4u
    How a person looks is NOT who they are! I think Fr_Chuck was just giving her some ideas of ways she can feel better about her self since they have to have made her feel down on herself. Sort of like women that go get their hair done when they get depressed. Not to please others but maybe to get more self confidence.
    You can create a new image for your looks and it doesn't mean that you are somebody else now. Unless of course you do something like go from plain Jane to slutty.
  • Aug 10, 2008, 07:01 PM
    ChihuahuaMomma
    What I mean by "how a person looks is who they are" is that that's what they look like, and it's something that you have to live with, it's you. I didn't mean that the way she looks should define her whole existence.

    She already stated that she has a lot of confidence. And this wasn't recently. From what I'm hearing, she just wanted advice on why her teacher would do this, not how to boost her (seemingly already high) self-esteem.
  • Aug 10, 2008, 07:03 PM
    N0help4u
    She said she can't understand why people think she is ugly I think that was her main concern.
  • Aug 10, 2008, 07:06 PM
    plutogirl
    I do have confidence but Im also really quietm shy and find it hard to get friends etc but I don't think Im unattractive.
  • Aug 10, 2008, 07:07 PM
    ChihuahuaMomma
    I think she answered her own question when she said that she didn't give her appearance too much care that day. Baseball hat and such. I would have to agree that popularity most likely took a part in these adolences decisions.
  • Aug 10, 2008, 07:08 PM
    ChihuahuaMomma
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by plutogirl
    I do have confidence but Im also really quietm shy and find it hard to get friends etc but I don't think Im unattractive.

    Same here. I have faced my shyness fear, and started working jobs where I was forced to be more social, and it's taught me to break out of my shell.
  • Aug 10, 2008, 07:08 PM
    letmetellu
    I don't agree with the teacher having a contest like tis but that is in the past. But let me tell you something about how others vote. You say it was to determine who was pretty, well maybe you don't dress like the others, that does not change your looks but it can sure change the way they might vote, Maybe you are not as "bubbly" as some of the others, that would not change your looks but it sure can change the way others might vote. One other thing, had you gone to the next class, with entirely different classmates, it might have been that you were votes the prettiest, so don't worry about what one group of classmates said two or three years ago.
  • Aug 10, 2008, 07:12 PM
    N0help4u
    I agree that it most likely was treated more as a popularity contest. I know that is the way the kids were when I was in school.
  • Aug 10, 2008, 09:56 PM
    natasblue
    I think only you know what you are actually comfortable with as far as "looking good" but If you feel yo need a change and want to atract men. Start making changes for yourself. Start with little ones like adding blod colors to your wardrobe if you don't wear them already. See how it makes you feel. Then maybe hair and make-up with pastel colors or a dress perhaps. I'm sure you truly are a beautifull person inside, and sometimes it doesn't hurt to let that shine on the outside. After all that is what other people see. So, find a style that suits your inner beauty and let it show on the outside. It can't hurt anything right?
  • Sep 22, 2008, 10:04 AM
    GothGirl1771

    Teacher should die! If I had a teacher like that, I'd punch her!

    Don't listen to her... just take care of yourself... maybe you were going through the :whatever": stage we alll go through you know?

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