Ask Me Help Desk

Ask Me Help Desk (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/forum.php)
-   Dating (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/forumdisplay.php?f=374)
-   -   Dating an older man (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=247335)

  • Aug 10, 2008, 06:03 AM
    Yazzi
    Dating an older man
    Hi. I am a 23 yr old and have recently met an older man and we are interested in dating to see if things would progress any further. My problem are my parents, that after going away for a weekend get away to see him (had to lie about it, and they found out after I came back) they have shown 110 percent anger and disappointment in me for doing what I did and are 200 percent against me dating this guy that's quite a lot older than me.
    I am here to ask for help, I don't need my ways of doing things analyzed but I do need help in coming up with excuses to see this guy again. The problem is that he is in the US and I am in canada so I do have to jump on the plane every time to see this guy which is no problem for me but makes this more complicated in trying to get away from my parents.
    So please, does anyone have any ideas on some "excuses/lies..whatever you choose to call it" so I can get away one of these weekends and see this guy..
    Please help...
  • Aug 10, 2008, 06:09 AM
    jjwoodhull
    If you are 23 years old why are you lying to your parents? They can have an opinion, but you are well into being an adult.

    Is it because you still live with them and depend on them financially? If so, then get a job, get your own place and live your life.
  • Aug 10, 2008, 06:42 AM
    Yazzi
    Hey JJ... thats true I am 23 and an adult but my parents are just trying to protect me which I understand but it doesn't mean I would like to listen at the moment at least!
    I do have a job and do not depend on them financially in anyway but I do live at home as I can't afford to move out just as yet... but in the meantime I still have this problem of wanting to see this guy... so... any suggestions?
  • Aug 10, 2008, 07:11 AM
    N0help4u
    As long as you live in their house you are subjected to listen to their opinions. You really shouldn't lie and make excuses. Be an adult and own up to what you are doing. If they don't like it tell them things like "I am 23 and it is time I made my own decisions and learned from my own mistakes even though I appreciate your concern it is time I grow up".
    If you do not live with them then you really don't even have to give them explanations or anything and shouldn't worry about it so maybe it is time to save up some money and move out on your own.
  • Aug 10, 2008, 08:06 AM
    maria16
    I know this doesn't really answer your question, but it sounds like it may be worth it to step back and examine the situation with the guy you're dating altogether.

    If you just met and you already have so many obstacles (age, distance, parents), are the positive aspects of the relationship worth all this? If you are having financial concerns then how are all the ticket prices affecting you?
    Is the guy putting in as much of an effort into the relationship? How come he doesn't come to visit and stay at a hotel or something? Is your relationship with your family worth jeopardizing over this? Are they overreacting or do they actually have a point?

    It just sounds like too much trouble to go through for someone you just recently met.
  • Aug 10, 2008, 09:32 AM
    Yazzi
    Hey maria...
    I do understand all the obsticles, but at the moment, as I said before... this is something I just have to do... and don't ask why...
    I do have financial problems but he is paying for the tickets, the hotel and everything else... he just has to be somewhere for that weekend so he is saying he will fly me down so that we could at least be together for the 2 days and then he will come and see me himself in the later months...
    But please... I know I am 23 and with regards to "no help4 u" guy, I have already tried that at teling them thank you very much for everything but I am 23 so let me decide... THAT KIND OF THING DOES NOT WORK... if I could reason with them sweetheart I wouldn't be going through all this hell... so... does ANYBODY... actually have some contructive help to give me... please do if you have ideas. Thanks. Appreciate it.
  • Aug 12, 2008, 01:00 PM
    liz28
    If your so interested in lying to your parents about seeing this guy, why don't you Google some lies to tell. If your parents are not dumb then maybe they would believe you. Good Luck but remember the truth always come to light because sooner or later your lies will catch up with you and then what??
  • Aug 13, 2008, 11:12 AM
    hidden123
    Hey Yazzi - a few questions: how old is the guy? How long are you dating? Why aren't you stying at his place but at the hotel when you're visiting?
  • Aug 13, 2008, 11:19 AM
    lmangileri
    The answers you are getting here are constructive. It's your lying that's destructive.

  • All times are GMT -7. The time now is 05:24 AM.