Made some wrong career choices and wasted some precious years of my life. Now I'm lagging behind all of my friends and peers... Even the ones who were far behind me academically are now well settled, happy and satisfied. The ones who used to ask for my help in everything, now talks to me in sympathetic tones. I feel utterly miserable. This ordeal doesn't seems to end ever! I have lost my faith on me, my confidence and my talents have faded away. This in inferiorty complex has rooted itself in me. I remain doubtful and confused about evrything. My mind always a mess up. I can't enjoy rain or music, can't behave normal, can't sleep, can't eat, can't even feel things. My sensibility, the biggest lost I have had. My sorrows are not sad enough and my happiness not happy enough.. like if I'm dreaming my own life and not actually living it. The losses have no recovery. M destroyed. Death seems to be my only way out of this painful slow degradation but my mom's love for me makes me weak to take this step. Its too painful to see sunrise evryday.. n m tired of crying screaming and hurting myself. Please help.. please.

Maybe it is time to put your faith in something higher than yourself. All of us are fallable; we all make mistakes and mess up. But there is a God who loves you, no matter who you are or what turns your life has taken, and He wants you to cast all of your problems on Him. If you do allow him to lead your life, you will find that you can finally rest. I would be happy to share more with you about this, if you are interested.

I am in pretty much the same situation. I feel like I lost out of a lot of years in a lot of ways.
All you can do is pick up the pieces and recreate yourself. You have an advantage in that since you really don't have any ties to hold you back.
Death is never the answer.

MooMoo2> I'm not sure if God or any superpower exists. And even if it does, one day your shattered trust makes you find that He is deaf and blind! There's so much disheartening injustice all around, people dying of hunger, innocents being tormented and people still talk about God! Its beyond me! There's nothing fair in this world, everything so damn random! I'm grateful you tried to help but this God thing will make my mind erupt!

I understand. It all gets very confusing, and very frustrating, doesn't it? But keep in mind that this was not how He intended things to be! While He could step in at any time and put us in a paradise, He gave us free will... and the result of our refusing to follow Him completely is that you see the types of things you describe.

BUT, you can still find peace in a relationship with Him. That is a promise. If you are unsure about Him, I might suggest you read "The Case for Christ" by Lee Stroebel. He was a very skeptical atheist who had some of the same questions you do... and he found answers!

You know, sometimes it is when things seem their worst that I can feel Him the most clearly. Like when I was told that my Dad had cancer, or when my newborn was taken to the NICU with a very grim prognosis... both times, I felt that "peace that passes understanding," and I know that it was because He was with me.

I'll read the book. Thanks again.