My fiancé and I are to get married in less than a month and we've been trying all summer to have a courthouse marriage but one thing or another keeps coming up (judges in our area don't do weddings, don't allow more than two witnesses, won't marry anyone from out of county, etc.)

Now we're trying to arrange a spiritual leader to marry us but we're not exactly sure on how to go about it. Most people in our family were married by judges so we don't have much information to go on. My questions are:

Can they do weekends?
How much will it cost?
Can they travel to a location?
Can we tailor the vows to be a little non-denominational since the few people we have coming are very devout but are of very different faiths?

I feel so foolish not knowing! :confused:

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Originally Posted by IntroducingEmy

My fiance and I are to get married in less than a month and we've been trying all summer to have a courthouse marriage but one thing or another keeps coming up (judges in our area don't do weddings, don't allow more than two witnesses, won't marry anyone from out of county, etc.)

Now we're trying to arrange a spiritual leader to marry us but we're not exactly sure on how to go about it. Most people in our family were married by judges so we don't have much information to go on. My questions are:

Can they do weekends?
How much will it cost?
Can they travel to a location?
Can we tailor the vows to be a little non-denominational since the few people we have coming are very devout but are of very different faiths?

I feel so foolish not knowing! :confused:

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I found the various "spiritual leaders" to have differing policies - some religions are more lenient (if that is the word) than others. Some will not marry people who do not belong to their congregation. Some have a set fees for weddings (this is their profession, not a hobby, and they deserve to be paid). I don't know, maybe some rely on donations.

Some would tailor the ceremony, some would not. Some would travel and so forth.

I'm sure there are Ministers who would be happy to accommodate you but you will have to contact quite a few to find one.

In the state where I live you can get married by a Justice of the Peace. Most have a place in their backyard or for an additional fee they will come to you. My friend got married at the beach at sunrise, for example. In Florida, notary publics can perform marriages. I would suggest you visit your state's website and find out what entities are allowed to perform marriage ceremonies and make a date. Congratulations!

I can totally relate to your delema.. last month I held my daughters wedding on my lawn and we had a very limited budget and the justice of the peace in my area were like $200. I felt that was too much.. so what my daughter did was she went to city hall and got the license a special license in which you can marry yourselves.. you can recite your own vows, they give you a paper that you sign saying that you have recited your own vows to each other and you are legally married after you sign this paper and you must have 2 witnesses.. what we did was we held a ceremony just like a wedding and they recited their vows to each other and my son acted as a (minister, judge or whatever you want to call it, just because he's a good speaker) justice of the peace... but it was only for the ceremonial purpose.. it turned out really beautiful and we didn't have that added expense.. this is in Pennsylvannia... you could find out in your state to see if they have this... let me know how it turns out...

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Originally Posted by digitalmom

I can totally relate to your delema.. last month i held my daughters wedding on my lawn and we had a very limited budget and the justice of the peace in my area were like $200. i felt that was too much.. so what my daughter did was she went to city hall and got the license a special license in which you can marry yourselves.. you can recite your own vows, they give you a paper that you sign saying that you have recited your own vows to each other and you are legally married after you sign this paper and you must have 2 witnesses.. what we did was we held a ceremony just like a wedding and they recited their vows to each other and my son acted as a (minister, judge or whatever you want to call it, just because hes a good speaker) justice of the peace... but it was only for the ceremonial purpose.. it turned out really beautiful and we didnt have that added expense.. this is in Pennsylvannia... you could find out in your state to see if they have this... let me know how it turns out...

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I have never heard of anything like this!

Sounds very personal and very touching -