My boyfriend and I have been dating for about two months and he doesn't want to have sex or even kiss. From the beginning I felt that he was a hard read, but was willing to give it a try. Just so you know we have things in common and always hang out. I told him how I was feeling and said that I need more of a balance. I feel emotionally connected but not physical connected and I think its important to have both. My boyfriend stated to me tonight that I was being selfish because I want sex. He compared us to a married couples who are in there comfort zone and still find happiness. So I'm thinking we are not married and we just started dating how could he compare. He also stated to me that if we base it on sex it will turn into a disaster. I was very upset that he said I was selfish. I tried to make him understand that I want to feel close to him and although I do in other ways I don't sexually. Then he states to me that he does not want to wear a condom which he has only worn a couple of times until we decided to become exclusive. He also says that maybe I should look into some form of birth control. But I think that even if he didn't like wearing condoms he would just to be with me.
Laura

1. Doesn't want sex.

2. doesn't want to wear a condom.

3. tells you to get on birth control.

... all of these things REALLY don't make sense altogether. Perhaps someone that can understand this guy can shed some light on this... but... I'm really lost. Usually, guys who don't want to wear a condom and who push girls into getting because are guys that simply want to have unprotected sex.

But... #1... is a bit off to me. I'm confused.

Its your body, don't let him dictate what he puts in it.

Its like someone telling you to eat poison. You know its wrong, and the consequences could be great... So do you do it?

You could end up pregnant or with an std, if you have sex with him and You're the one who wants a condom on his penis. And yet you give in... Well that's not having respect for yourself.

What's the difference with before becoming exclusive and now?

If he had something, you can still get it. What makes you think he was using one with someone else?

Just cause he worn one with you then, doesn't mean if you don't wear one now its going to protect you.

2 months isn't long enough to sit there and take his crud. Actually, its not selfish to want sex in a healthy long term relationship. Yours is only at 2 months, so don't rush it. Just move on to someone who respects you.

Trust me, been there, put up with it and no it does not get any better.
He compared us to a married couples who are in there comfort zone and still find happiness is cover up for being selfish and only wanting what he wants when HE wants on HIS terms.
Selfish =him not you!

Basically the honeymoon is over hun!

Hi pretty girl.. you don't say how old you both are, but the way he is acting says quite young ( sorry if I'm wrong ).

It all sounds a bit odd to me , OK not wanting sex is one thing but to not want to kiss you either, very odd.I suppose he has had a girl friend before, because he sounds very inexperienced like he's never had sex, which would explain a lot wouldn't it.

Why are you still with him because it's obviously not for his loving tender care.
Two months is quite a while, and he's still the same... selfish, only thinks about himself.

Unless he can come up with some sort of reasonable explanation for his behavior,then I would move on, there will be someone out there who will give you the love and attention you deserve.

Goodluck

Then I have known odd guys in my life :( :D

He has no love or passion for you... forget about sex-he is giving you double talk.

Be looking around for another man. :)

Oh boy. I am in that situation right now! I have been with my boyfriend for 3 months. I have to beg or plead to have sex. I have tried everything in my power to get him turned on to me. DO NOT SETTLE. You are not selfish for having sexual needs, and wanting to feel connected to him. If he won't fulfill your needs, perhaps he isn't right for you?

Am ready to be the next one... what say?

On the sex part, he may not believe in random sex, or may even have serious moral ideas of no sex till marriage.

If he says no to sex before marriage that's great. And please don't rush into sex with guys before marriage. When you have sex with somebody you unite with him and when you break the relationship you almost break a mini marriage. And the break up is like a mini divorce.

But the detailed story indicates that he is drinking water somewhere else. As you are not sure, so just take your time. Try to find out what's in his mind... and the time will tell you what to do...

Thanks...

Ha, I don't know maybe he is a virgin and is scared to have sex Idk. But if this continues find another guy who can please you.