I guess what I really need is someone who can contact my father. His name is Bill, he died in 92.

Last year, someone contacted me to tell me that she is my sister. My mother's child, she was given up for adoption when I was 5 years old. I don't know why I don't remember any of this.

My father signed the adoption papers. He was very curious about the baby. His family told me this. He actually wanted to keep the baby.

My Mother doesn't want to talk about it but said that my sisters father is someone she met and married and then got the marriage annulled (legally) because he was still married to someone else. She decided to give the baby up for adoption so that she could have a good life. My mother didn't feel she could provide that for her at that time, she had my brother and myself to take care of and she was divorced.

This is all confusing to me. I think my mother is lying, she won't talk about it and I do understand why. The situation was terrible for me, and my mother actually was very angry with me because my sister contacted me.

I would just like to know the whole story. I need to know. Did my father forget? Why didn't he tell me? Is he her father too? Maybe my mother lied to him also? I have no clue and so many questions.

I met my sister and bonded very quickly, we are so much a like in many ways.
The thing is my mother doesn't know, she doesn't want to know. I have no one to talk to about all of this. And I need answers. The only one I know that might be able to give me the answers is my dad, and he died in 92.

Dad's B-date 8/12/35... My b-date 11/15/65 My sisters b-date 12/28/70

If someone could help, I would really appreciate it.

Thanks for reading...

Get the other person, go get a DNA test, it can prove if you are related and fairly well how close.

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Originally Posted by Fr_Chuck

Get the other person, go get a DNA test, it can prove if you are related and fairly well how close.

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Thank you for your response. Yes, I do see that as the logical thing to do. However it can be very expensive and we don't have the financial resources at this time. Also, I was led to believe that they could only determine that we are siblings, not if we have the same father or not. I was told that I would need DNA from my father to test with her DNA.. which of course is not possible.

Thanks again..

HI,
If your mother won't talk with you about it, then there seems to be no other alternative. I do wish you the best.

Actually DNA tests are not really that expensive ( OK if you are living on food stamps and welfare it may be) but there are lab test centers in most major cities that do simple tests very cheaply. A few hundred dollars most likely

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Originally Posted by fredg

HI,
If your mother won't talk with you about it, then there seems to be no other alternative. I do wish you the best.

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??

Did you not read the responses that Fr Chuck made?

A DNA test will be one way to prove it.

Also by looking up original birth certificates or marriage licences.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Fr_Chuck

actually DNA tests are not really that expensive ( ok if you are living on food stamps and welfare it may be) but there are lab test centers in most major cities that do simple tests very cheaply. A few hundred dollars most likely

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Thank you for your response. I am on a fixed income, no I'm not on welfare but I could probably qualify for food stamps if I applied. So I can't afford a test that may cost a couple of hundred dollars at this time. Boy, now I'm embarrassed.

I was also told that they could tell that we are siblings but not if we have the same father unless we could get a sample from him, which of course is impossible.

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Originally Posted by CaptainForest

?????

Did you not read the responses that Fr Chuck made?

a DNA test will be one way to prove it.

Also by looking up original birth certificates or marriage licences.

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My father at the time of the adoption wanted to get back together with my mother. They were divorced in 1968. My father is the one who signed the adoption papers along with my mother, and he is on the original birth certificate. I'm not sure what kind of record there is of that, I only know what the adoption papers say. What the adoption papers also say is that he is not the father, some guy named Ken is... This is the man that my mother explained to me that she married and had the marriage annulled because he was already married. I'm just trying to put the puzzle together.
I don't even know where to start to look for a marriage license on a marriage that was annulled. I don't have details.

As far as DNA... They can prove we are siblings. They can prove (if my mother wanted to give a sample) that she is my mothers child. They can't prove she's the child of a dead man. This is what I was told..

Just curious...I know you have a lot of questions, it is a big mystery and we all love a good one, but tell me this......is it really so important to find out? Is their some health issue to be known by this? Something that would change your present life situation for the better? Often we get so caught up in the unknown that we forget what is real. If your sister is so curious and you are on a fixed income, have her pay. She is the one who contacted you to begin with. Also you should be able to feel if you are truly siblings by intuition and mannerism. Some things we seldom look for are passed down from each parent.
If you really want to question then you need more than a psychic. I feel nothing from this issue except pain and confusion.

Hypatia

I was going to say something similar to what Hypatia said. It seems from what you have been told that your sister is indeed your mother's child. Whether she is a half sister or a full sister really shouldn't matter. What matters is how you feel about each other.

As to DNA testing, yes it can determine if you're a siblings from the same parents.