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-   -   Unfit mother? (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=242204)

  • Jul 27, 2008, 10:39 AM
    eisiminger11
    Unfit mother?
    My soon to be ex-wife has sent nude pics over the internet to other males, has stated that she wanted to run away with him, has put my 1 year old son in harms way by not having him in a car seat, and I have just learned that she is sleeping with her step-brother, who is living with her at her mothers house. Is this a unfit parent? Can anyone tell me?
  • Jul 27, 2008, 10:41 AM
    danielnoahsmommy
    Being unfit? She has a mental problem and needs help. She definitely sounds unstable
  • Jul 27, 2008, 11:21 AM
    Fr_Chuck
    sounds like very bad moral values, but I know hookers who sleep with men for money that are considered very good "mothers" they feed the child, they keep them clean and care for them. Morality in sex unless it effects the minor is not normally part of a unfit mother, It can be used as part of the divorce.
  • Jul 27, 2008, 11:50 AM
    simoneaugie
    Is she drinking or doing drugs? That would possibly explain her lack of values. Excessive use of mind-altering substances by her is a plus for you, if you're attempting to prove that she is an unfit parent.
  • Jul 27, 2008, 06:31 PM
    cdad
    To be honest a judge doesn't get to excited about accusations of harms way even if the mother never uses a carseat. Just don't ever get caught doing it yourself because then it's a major violation.
  • Jul 27, 2008, 06:51 PM
    Fr_Chuck
    I will be honest, I got in trouble with my Sgt for writing a car seat ticket when I was a officer, he told me not to make a big deal out of it. So even that will depend on the dept
  • Jul 27, 2008, 08:38 PM
    eisiminger11
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by califdadof3
    To be honest a judge doesnt get to excited about accusations of harms way even if the mother never uses a carseat. Just dont ever get caught doing it yourself because then its a major violation.

    I am also a police officer and I have it on video that she did not use a car seat
  • Jul 28, 2008, 05:29 PM
    eisiminger11
    Unfit Mother? More info.
    I posted a question a few days ago, asking if my soon to be ex-wife was a unfit mother, here is the whole thing from the beginning. I am in the Navy, and back in April my father had a massive heart attack which I took emergency leave to see him in the hospital, and be there if the worst happened (Luckily it didn't). While I was up there she was into a golf game on the PS3, and she meet a guy on there. I didn't care that she talks to other guys, I trusted her. But while I was up there she would hardly talk to me or her friends. When I got back I knew that something was wrong, because she still would not talk. Two days later she asked me for a divorce. I didn't want to get one. She wouldn't even try any counseling. The next day(after I kicked her out) her family came to pick her up. Then she wanted to work this out. This is when we were only a week from closing on our first house. So I had to take it in the rear with that. Later I found out from a friend that she was talking to that she was planning to run away to Colorado with this guy. And take my kids with her. But she kept on denying everything. She was lying about a lot of things, pretty much everything. During all of this I got promoted to E-5 and got orders to Yokosuka Japan for 3 years. So with all the lying and all I asked her if she was planning to go through with the divorce when I got overseas. She said "it depend on you". So I ended it right there. When I came up there to visit my kids, she was at a water park with them. When she came home my 1 year old son was not in a car seat. I got that on video. So now I am on leave with my kids before I go overseas, and I got a phone call from a old neighbor. She told me that she said that she had a boyfriend. And he lives there. My old neighbor asked who was he she said that it was her step-brother. And she said that her mother and step dad is OK with it. Her grandmother knows but disapproves, and the church even knows. They will not let them sit next to each other. So today I asked my 5 year old if Uncle Bryan sleeps in mommys room, he said sometimes. You tell me if I should let my children go back to that environment. Also she doesn't have a job. I was told by her family that she isn't even looking.

    J
  • Jul 28, 2008, 05:34 PM
    stinawords
    This really needs to be combined with the other thread so that all of the replys so far can be seen as well as this part.
  • Jul 28, 2008, 05:46 PM
    ylaira
    She sounded more an unfit wife than a mother. You didn't mention she's a druggie, alcoholic,abusive, mentally ill (which are most likely the winning defense) other than forgetting to strap your child in a baby sit and jobless.

    Consult a lawyer.
  • Jul 28, 2008, 07:19 PM
    N0help4u
    It sounds like she may be neglectful and not being the best example to her kids but as Fr_chuck said even hookers can be good mothers. I know crackho girls that have a lot of kids to a lot of different guys and they leave their kids to go out all night and then sleep all day and do not lose their kids. You would have to document everything that she is doing that directly affects their health and well being like not feeding them, not keeping them clean, doing drugs around them, etc...
    Maybe talk to the Pastor at the church about what you can do for the best interest of the kids and ask him to keep an eye over them for you while you are gone.
  • Jul 28, 2008, 11:58 PM
    gkmishra71
    She is unfit as a human being... I india we say... Let the bird go & fly, if it comes back to you it was yours and if it dose'nt, it was never yours... so take legal actions to protect your children...

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