Ask Me Help Desk

Ask Me Help Desk (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/forum.php)
-   Relationships (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/forumdisplay.php?f=277)
-   -   Dating for 2 years, found him on online sexdating website (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=241818)

  • Jul 26, 2008, 06:52 AM
    Moonlight55
    Dating for 2 years, found him on online sexdating website
    I have been dating this wonderful guy for about 2 years now. We moved in together over 8 months ago. Im 27 and he is 37. We used to have sex all the time, and he used to be very affectionate towards me. Now its about 2 or 3 times a month. I am the one that always tries to have sex. When I start touching him he just lays there and watches t.v. Usually, if someone is trying to arouse you wouldn't you turn towards them and start touching that person? Well he doesn't anymore. He justs looks like he would rather not do this, but since I'm hard now I need to. He's not very affectionate at all anymore. I've dropped hints to him, but he just shrugs if off like its no big deal. When he have sex it lasts for a few minutes, he says "sorry, its been awhile" then he turns over and starts to watch t.v again. UMMM hello? Sorry, a female usually doesn't get her fix in two minutes. So I lay there horny and he doesn't attempt to finish my needs. So I just go to sleep. Well I have wondered, am I not attractive to him anymore? Is it the age difference? What's going on? He says he loves my very much. But where is the passion?
    I came home from work one day to find the computer signed on under his screenname and a website called hornymatches.com. I couldn't believe that he had a profile on this website. I seen his screename and decided to look at it later. So I did some searching. His profile says "he is looking to satisfy his horny urges" He is into 1-1 sex, and couples. It says he is bi-curious. WHAT?? I was shocked!! So now I wonder... what do I do? He doesn't know that I seen this. I don't want to embarrass him by telling him, but at the same time... is that why he doesn't have sex with me?
    I need some MAJOR advice! I want to talk with him about this, but I don't know how or where to begin...
  • Jul 26, 2008, 08:54 AM
    talaniman
    Quote:

    I want to talk with him about this, but I don't know how or where to begin...
    That's your real problem, lack of communications. Express yourself in a non-confrontational way and see if he is willing to communicate back. If not, you don't have the solid, caring relationship you thought you had. Through communications you can address your issues and work together to solve your problems to the benefit of you both.

    Forget about sex till then.
  • Jul 26, 2008, 09:00 AM
    N0help4u
    Even if you found a way to talk to him about it he most likely would deny it and claim he is just curious and looking. I doubt he would ever admit that he is into any of that unless you told him that you are okay with it.
    I think I would be seeing how far he takes this and then packing some bags.
    To me if a guy goes from wanting sex regularly to not interested AND goes on sites it seems to imply that he has lost interest in you.
  • Jul 26, 2008, 09:21 AM
    Romefalls19
    Without communication in a relationship is like a boat with a hole in the hull, surely to sink in time. You should really talk to him about this but bring it up casually without attacking him or he will meet you with a lot of resistance

  • All times are GMT -7. The time now is 05:04 AM.