OK so I have a red birth mark or what the doctor call it a port wine stain, how can I remove it at home or lighten it up

A good dermatologist can remove it with some quick and easy laser treatments. If it were me, I would leave this to a professional.

Where is it? And how large is it?

You cannot remove it at home, you can use some sort of camouflage makeup, but that's it.

If it's a health problem, sometimes it can be remove and a skin graft can be performed to replace the skin, but that's rare.

Look for a cover makeup like you might used on your face for blemishes.

The following information comes from wikipedia. There is a ton of useful information related to the topic online.


Port-wine stain - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

Treatment

Many treatments have been tried for port-wine stains including freezing, surgery, radiation, and tattooing; port-wine stains can also be covered with cosmetics. Lasers have made the biggest impact on treatment, because they are the sole method of destroying the cutaneous capillaries without significant damage to the overlying skin.