Here's my issue... My ex and I were going out for 2yrs and living together for about 1yr and a half... she broke up with me about 2 months ago and I just can't let her go... She moved into the other bedroom of the condo and wants to be roommates. I don't have the heart to tell her to get out, and to be honest I can use her rent money to help pay the bills... I probably won't be able to find another roommate because we have 2 dogs together and if she leaves, I know I am stuck with the dogs... I don't know what she is feeling inside... Sometimes she wants to sleep in my bed and I let her, other times she comes in and lays on my bed while I am in there watching TV and she watches with me, then falls asleep... we still go to the movies together, get ice cream, and go to dinner, the gym,, etc, etc... I don't know if she is using me or she still has feelings and there is a chance to fix the situation... I know if I tell her to leave then there probably will be no chance of reconciling. I am lost, I've only lived in the city I am in for about 3yrs and don't really know many people, so my social life revolved around her. If anyone has sound advice, please share it with me...

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Originally Posted by blizzard_wolves

Here's my issue... My ex and i were going out for 2yrs and living together for about 1yr and a half... she broke up with me about 2 months ago and i just can't let her go... She moved into the other bedroom of the condo and wants to be roommates. I don't have the heart to tell her to get out, and to be honest i can use her rent money to help pay the bills... I probably won't be able to find another roommate because we have 2 dogs together and if she leaves, i know i am stuck with the dogs... I don't know what she is feeling inside... Sometimes she wants to sleep in my bed and i let her, other times she comes in and lays on my bed while i am in there watching TV and she watches with me, then falls asleep... we still go to the movies together, get ice cream, and go to dinner, the gym,,, etc, etc... I don't know if she is using me or she still has feelings and there is a chance to fix the situation... I know if i tell her to leave then there probably will be no chance of reconciling. I am lost, i've only lived in the city i am in for about 3yrs and don't really know many people, so my social life revolved around her. If anyone has sound advice, please share it with me...

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It sounds like she is reaping the benefits of a relationship without the responsibilities. My heart goes out to you. Eventually she will start dating again, and I would, for your own sanity, strongly suggest giving her a time frame to move out. I hate to use the expression, but she needs to crap or get off the pot. I would post ads, flyers, etc. looking for a new roommate so you can manage financially without her- some people are dog lovers, or you may find a friend willing to help take care of one or both.
I know it's hard to put yourself out there and meet new people. I'm very shy myself. Please don't let yourself get taken advantage of out of fear of the unknown. I'd have a last sit- down with her explaining your feelings and asking her where she sees your relationship heading. Then I would try to move on if you don't get the answers you're seeking. Miss Right is out there somewhere- don't give up. Use this time to learn to be comfortable with yourself and to get invol;ved in the community (libraries, laundromats, parks, etc. are great places to strike up conversations and make new acquaintances.) All the best- you'll be OK.