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-   -   I have a boyfriend, but I think I'm in love with my best friend. What will I do? (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=239094)

  • Jul 18, 2008, 09:32 PM
    mArZ 13
    I have a boyfriend, but I think I'm in love with my best friend. What will I do?
    Help me please. I don't know what to do. I love my boyfriend and I love my best friend, my best friend told me that he is in love with me and today, he decided to let me go because he knew I love my boyfriend but we're no longer bestfriends anymore. What will I do? I don't want him to go. I'm so emotional. I'm so confused. :confused: :(
  • Jul 19, 2008, 01:12 AM
    Clough
    Hi, mArZ 13!

    From your other post, I noticed that you say that you are 16. Being a teenager is tough! All teenagers go through a lot of changes both physically and mentally before they become mature adults. At your age, relationships can be on and off in a flash! How people handle things depends on the level of insight, understanding and knowledge that they have with the kinds of situations with which they are dealing. This is one of those situations where you learn how to handle other, similar situations. It's all a part of growing up.

    I think that the best thing that you could do right now is tell your best friend that you can appreciate the way that he feels but would still like to be friends with him - then the rest would be his choice. Then I would suggest accepting the choice that he makes. We can't control how another person thinks and feels but can make choices as to how we are going to think and feel. It might be, that in time, you will be best friends again. If not, then perhaps just friends. Who knows? Can't tell the future. Please give things time and don't feel as though you need to be in a rush in order to see the results.

    Hopefully, others will also be along to address your post.
  • Jul 19, 2008, 06:06 AM
    N0help4u
    If you think you are in love with your best friend then you need to really think about who you love more and who you would seriously have a better long lasting relationship with.
    Not a good idea to stick with one person if your heart is truly with somebody else --at least at your young age.
  • Jul 19, 2008, 08:41 AM
    jrsg
    Who do you love more?
    I know it may sound like an awful decision to make, but it has to be made.

    I am 16 as well. If I were your boyfriend, I would want to know about this other guy (your best friend). If you love your best friend more, you should break up with your boyfriend and go to your best friend. I think the best thing you can do in this situation is let your boyfriend know what's happening. Make him aware of your feelings for this other guy. It is not fair to you or your boyfriend to continue a relationship when you love someone else.

    If you DO love your boyfriend more than your best friend, then continue with your boyfriend.

    And N0help4u is right, at the young age we are at, we should not be with one person when our heart is with another.
  • Jan 13, 2011, 08:27 PM
    BattmenMango
    I'm having the same problem. My boyfriend is very understanding so I told him that I was in love with my best friend and we are working through it.Everyone says who do you love more? But it's not always that simple because I think I love them both equally.
    I'd say to first off tell your boyfriend. Then who you are more comfortable with and would make you happier to be with. If you can't decide maybe you can ask for a break from your boyfriend to think things over and ask friends you are close to.
    It's much harder than most people think but try counting every time you think about each person rate them on a scale of 1-10. But it is good that you are young.

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