My husbands been really quiet lately, I've noticed a little change in his love behavior with me and attitude all in all, So I came home early one day and logged into his computer and found he was going on gay chat lines and looking on craigslist and I clicked on some of the people he was speaking to which showed a lot of male parts. I confronted him and he said no he wasn't gay. How do I know?We've been married for 6 years and have two boys... :confused:

You DON'T know. Unless he tells you that he's gay, or you walk in on him um... playing catch... with another man, you won't know.

However--you HAVE uncovered the fact that he was doing things that no married man should be doing--whether or not he's gay.

If he's not willing to go with you to counseling, or at least cease and desist all such activities, then you're going to have to determine whether you're willing to put up with a partner that is deceiving you, even if only on the computer.

Let's put it this way: How would HE feel if he found out that YOU had done the same thing he has?

A married guy ( or a married woman) shouldn't be doing that with another woman much less gay guys. Watching porn is one thing... but interacting with others online in that manner is not cool however for anyone in a committed relationship.

I would like to say that a person should never snoop on their spouse... nothing good ever comes from snooping.

With that said, I think you both need to go to couple's counselling as soon as possible. Both of you need a professional to hear your innermost thoughts about sexuality... it may be possible to save your marriage.


Best wishes,