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-   -   How do I get rid of my ex's family? (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=237985)

  • Jul 16, 2008, 02:32 AM
    kentgurl
    How do I get rid of my ex's family?
    I have tried everything!! Have changed numbers, have changed email accounts, have told them I really need to be separate and do things alone right now, but they won't leave me be-

    This is the last email I got

    Hey I'm really sorry but not being able to text you and see you is too difficult, I miss you so much. I keep thinking about when you used to text me and tell me about supernatural , I've seen all season 3 now. I just feel empty, because you were one of my best friends and I can't just forget about you, I'm sorry, but I can't. Its not fair that I have 2 stop being friends with you because of what's happened, I thought we would always be friends, every time we drive past your flat I wonder what your doing and if your OK and its just too much, I still think of you as a big sister, and now I don't have anyone to talk 2 who like all the same stuff as me, all my friends are at uni and working and don't want to bother with me and to be honest I feel depressed. I'm not trying to make you feel guilty, its just honestly how I feel. Please message me back and talk to me, even you just email me for now, so I can just stay in contact with you, please. I'm really sorry again and I know its not easy but please talk to me.

    I'm ignoring it but she has sent it to my work email to- it feels like I'm being stalked!

    Is it best to break off all ties with Ex and co after break up? Why can't they understand that I just don't have time for them any more? I think breaking off all ties is healthier but people say I'm being mean.

    Please help
  • Jul 16, 2008, 04:29 AM
    N0help4u
    If you had a good relationship with them then there should be no reason to cut all ties unless
    they are using it as a way to keep ties of you to your X -like keeping him informed.
    If they are stalking you then I would not even reply to the emails
    The more you reply the more they feel a strand of hope still open.
  • Jul 16, 2008, 05:47 AM
    Romefalls19
    My parents still talk to my ex, I just chose not to know what about. They had a great relationship and I see no reason to make them cut off contact with her if they don't wish to. The final decision is yours though, if you can talk to them and not your ex it wouldn't be a problem.
  • Jul 16, 2008, 05:50 AM
    HistorianChick
    Having dealt with a crazy ex-family, I completely understand the need to sever ties... It's a touchy situation, especially if you were friends with his sister (this is what I'm reading into this). Been there, done that.

    For me, (in one situation) I didn't reply and they got the message. But, if they aren't getting the message then you need to tell them (the sister) that you are uncomfortable with continuing a relationship with the family. Be honest and explain why.

    If, after you do this, they persist, sadly, the only way to guarantee that they leave you alone is to tell them that you will take all means necessary to stop the communication. I had to do this once. It was difficult, but it worked.

    At that point, you can print off the email that you requested the communication to cease and go to the police station to file the report. You won't have to take out a restraining order, simply report it. That way it is on record. You can then tell the family that you filed the report and will take out a restraining order if they don't stop.

    But, do what you say. If you say that you will file a report, be prepared to do it.

    Honestly, I don't think this situation merits filing a report at this point. Just be honest with the girl, she sounds very needy. Tell her that you enjoyed the relationship and like her as a person, but it hurts you to continue the relationship. Don't leave the door open for "maybe some day" because that is not cutting ties.

    I wish you the best!
  • Jul 16, 2008, 08:47 AM
    JBeaucaire
    It sounds like your serious about keeping No Contact. So, get rudely serious.

    Have your computer guy at work configure your computer to delete his incoming emails or bounce them back. YOU should never even see them. That solves that problem.
    • If that doesn't end the communications (he finds some NEW way to talk to you), stop being so nice to him.
    • Warn him once that all further contact in any form will cause you to involve others in reprimanding him - family, workers, police, whomever. Then do exactly that.
      • Ask a policeman to knock on his door and tell him to leave you alone, "officially".
      • Call his parents and tell them to keep their nutso son away from you.
      • Embarass him at work.

    Some people simply WON'T take the hint and you have to spell it out in embarrassing clarity in front of others.
  • Jul 16, 2008, 04:48 PM
    talaniman
    Send everything they send to spam, and never reply ever again, to any way they do contact you.

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