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-   -   My boyfriend lied to me about cancer! (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=237402)

  • Jul 14, 2008, 02:25 PM
    Kayla8918
    My boyfriend lied to me about cancer!
    So my boyfriend and I have been dating for two years. Hes lied to me in the past about things we worked through. Every time he lied I would ask him if there was something else he needed to tell me. He would respond with a no. Last night I was hanging out with his sister. Were very close and talk about everything. So I started talking to her about the fact that he told me right when we first started dating that he had cancer as a child. She told me it was a huge lie and it wasn't true. I haven't eaten or slept since that moment last night. I called him and he confessed. What should I do?
  • Jul 14, 2008, 02:54 PM
    plonak
    He needs to get help for his pathelogical lying.. he has some major problems..

    I personally think it's like an addiction.. they tell a lie about something to shock people and that gives them a little high.. people are giving him attention that he craves.. maybe he was neglected as a child.. but he seriously needs to get help it's a serious problem.
  • Jul 14, 2008, 03:50 PM
    ylaira
    Plonak is right! Liars loves the attention when they said something shocking so they can "impress" with no obvious motivation. I don't know,Pathological Liars as I have observed, usually a lie on something that u will feel sorry about them and for the most part they believe its true.

    I once watched one episode of Oprah, the guest has this condition. She lied to her husband that their child has a cancer, she called her friends that she's killing herself and when her friends got on their place, she's just sleeping!

    He needs help... convince him to visit a counselor since he hurt you bad by making youbelieve on a lie.
  • Jul 15, 2008, 05:43 AM
    Romefalls19
    He needs to seek counseling for being a compulsive liar and then up to you to decide if you wish to be with him or not
  • Jul 15, 2008, 05:46 AM
    ScottGem
    Yes he needs to seek counseling, but that's HIS issue not yours. Your question is about what YOU should do. My answer is to end the relationship, now! You will never have any trust for this person and a solid relationship can only be built on trust.
  • Jul 15, 2008, 06:16 AM
    starlite1
    Lying is never a good thing. He really needs to seek professional help to deal with this. If it continues, this will definatley hinder your relationship. I don't think he does it to hurt you or anyone, but of course it isn't right at all, and everyone will be hurt by it, intentional, or not. He has a problem, and needs to get to the root of it. How would you know if he is telling the truth or not, with anything?
  • Jul 15, 2008, 07:12 AM
    talaniman
    You have been putting up with this behavior for 2 years? How? Why??

    Just don't see how you can stay, when you will never get the truth about anything.
  • Jul 15, 2008, 07:19 AM
    ISneezeFunny
    ... you sure he's not lying to you about actually being a man?

    ... lying about things like, "Oh, I used to be rich," is one thing... or "My watch is a real rolex," is another thing...

    ... but... cancer?. that's crossing the line.

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