Hi

I've been married for 3 years. I am 26yrs old & I have 3 beautiful daughters. I don't feel any affection towards my husband anymore because he just does as he pleases. The past weekend he went out with his cousins & only came back on Monday night. He phoned me from his mom's house before he came home to ask me for a separation.

I said it's fine we can separate because I feel it will be best for us & for the kids, but he is still in the house.

What should I do with him. I have made up my mind now & I am not going to take him back, but now he is doing all sorts of things to impress my mom. He did the washing & he cleans the kitchen & baths the kids etc.

I just want him to get out but my mom said I shouldn't throw him out I have to wait for him to leave on his own.

I am so irritated with this.
What can I do.

First of all who cares what your mom says.
Second of all it is your own choice and it sounds like it has been coming and he is the one that asked for the separation.
Thirdly, there are children involved. I think that no matter what you need to let him be presence in the life of your children, so whether you like it or not, it is still best for the children, right?
I am only going by what your saying, has there been any kind of counseling of any kind, is there any kind of ways of working through this? Or if it is done, you need to end it.
Does your mom live with you?
If this is the case, inlaws and parental influence, could this put a strain on the marriage?
Who Owns / Rents the resisdence? You or your mom? Your mom does legally you can not do anything to get him to leave.
I am not sure of your complete situation so my advice is just my opinions and reactions to what is written and it also depends on what are the living arrangements.

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Originally Posted by Bronwyn

Hi

I've been married for 3 years. I am 26yrs old & i have 3 beautiful daughters. I don't feel any affection towards my husband anymore because he just does as he pleases. The past weekend he went out with his cousins & only came back on Monday night. He phoned me from his mom's house before he came home to ask me for a separation.

I said it's fine we can separate because i feel it will be best for us & for the kids, but he is still in the house.

What should i do with him. I have made up my mind now & I am not going to take him back...

I just want him to get out but my mom sed i shouldnt throw him out i have to wait for him to leave on his own.

I am so irritated with this.
What can i do.

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Sometimes, Moms are wiser. Either you, or he, will have to get the ball rolling. Here is some information about a temporary order. You need to read-up on the divorce process in your jurisdiction; visit (interview) two or three lawyers and develop an understanding about what they do. If you have time, go to a couple of divorce hearings at the local courthouse. Check this: Temporary Divorce Court Orders – Why are Temporary Orders Issued During Divorce

Have both of you tried marriage counseling ?

But tell you mom she can marry him if she likes him if you are done with it. Some things are your choices, But often both sides give up way to easy and fast, they don't want to put effort into making it work.

Well I think that I might know what to do.. This is what my sister did to her man because he wouldn't leave.. It might sound a bit absurd but she got another boyfriend and told him about it later she moved the new guy in and now my ex-bother-in law is not there anymore.. Hope this helps!

Talk with an attorney, not mom!