My sister is 2 years older than me and we were never close growing up. When I was 21 I gave birth to my first son, that is when I realized that she had always been jealous of me, because we are totally different. She's a book worm and I'm more out going. Up until 3 years ago she had her first child and by then I had 4. I put a picture of my ONLY nephew on myspace page (which is private) and she flew off the handle, during this time my son was out in California visiting her, she got so irate, she sent my son to his dad's in UTAH behind my back and we haven't talked since (about a year) I tried to e-mail her once a while ago and she told me that I no longer existed to her and she doesn't have a sister anymore, should I be content because I tried to reconcile with her and she didn't accept or should I wait awhile and try again. We were never ever close and we probably won't be but she is totally cutting me out of my nephew's life and won't even communicate with her nephew's or niece because of me. I don't think that's fair at all to the kids...

It sounds like she was trying to find an excuse to get mad at you.
I doubt after all these years anything will get better so I would just wait and let it be up to her if she wants to make up. If you try and she goes for it she will likely just find more excuses to be mad.

It's a little difficult to comment on something like this because like most stories there are two sides.

I've witnessed a petty "sibling rivalry" in my family between my mom and aunt. My aunt thought my mom was jealous and although I disagreed with most of my mom's behavior towards my aunt and everyone else for that matter I do not believe she's jealous. Their problem stems from childhood issues but not jealousy.

Im not saying your sister isn't jealous but you didn't give any info to suggest that she might be.

My aunt has stayed away from my mom and in the process my siblings and I felt the rift and wanted to see our aunt but we understood why we couldn't.

If your nephew is young he may not understand the cause of this but he may already feel the rift. You could just send a birthday card every year (just do something to show him you still care) but you can't make her communicate with you. You can only try to keep the line of communication open between you and your nephew.

As for your children, depending on the ages explain your sister's absence but don't get into the "she's jealous of me" thing just explain that --she's living her life--in better terms. Keep them out of the drama and don't try to make her look bad.

Like my mom always says: If someone is a really nasty person you don't have to say things to make them look bad sooner or later their actions will do the job!

Is your mother around to help mediate?