My girlfriend and I have been on and off now for almost a year.. and I just tend to be really concerned about her to the point I can't sleep at night lol.. I just want this to really work this time and I'm always asking her if she's OK and if she's all right.. im just always worried about her and the things she does.. like is this normal or am I just being overprotective?. her and her ex have been broken up for 2 years now but should I be getting upset if she tells me she's good friends with his sister and is going over to his house to watch a movie with her like is that a big deal or am I making it into one... I trust her its just I ask lot of questions and I don't want to be left heartbroken... I like this girl a lot and I'm just looking out for her the best way that I can.. but at the same time how do I not worry as much?

Why are you two on and off?
Sounds like you are a bit insecure. You either trust your girl or you don't and until you get a grip on your insecurity, you two are going to be on and off so much, you're going to be off.
Has she ever given you reason to be this insecure?

I agree, good point. I can understand a little bit of worry when she goes to her friend's house, but if you trust her then it should be very minimal. And from what you've described you are very insecure, and overprotective. If you don't stop this behavior it WILL drive her away.

Does your gf's ex boyfriend live at the same house as his sister? I guess I could see how that could make a person a little nervous. It could really be that she's just good friends with the sister. Maybe she's more into you and totally done with her ex.

Is there anything else? I mean if she acts like she's not at all interested in getting back together again, I really wouldn't worry about it. Your best bet is to be OK with it unless she gives you some specific reasons you should worry.

All right Chihuahua are we reading each other's mail lol..

Lol, yeah, we always do that... Also, is there perhaps a reason that you are so protective and insecure in this relationship, and so afraid that she will leave you? Perhaps something that you haven't told us? Have you cheated or been unfaithful in any way?

Noo aha guys its not that I'm insecure its just maybe I'm being overprotected and I have been faithful and have never cheated... where finally steady in this relatonship and I don't want to loose her.. she says she still has feelings for her ex but they been done for 2 years.. and I can understand that cause not everyone gets over there exs... maybe I don't trust her... how do I get that trust?

If you don't stop being over protective be you will probably lose her because no girl wants to be controlled by a guy and look at it this way.. you move out of your parents house so that you can be on your own and so you don't have to listen to them telling you what to do, you don't want to live with a someone that acts like your parents do you? Any of you ask a girl too many times if they are okay or what's wrong it starts to get annoying and it starts a fight believe me I'm a girl.. And of she really loves you she won't cheat on you with her ex cause and if she really wanted to be with him she shouldn't of waited 2 years to do it.. Do you want to have a kid?

If you can't relax, and enjoy this time together, you will tear this relationship up from the inside. The time you spend worrying, should be spent doing fun things, and not about exes, and if this will last. Nobody knows what will be, so live in the now, not the what if.
Maybe what you need is a confidant, or older trusted person, to talk to face to face, to calm your fears, which is where this is coming from.

I think you are insecure, you ask too many questions, want to control too many things. This will ruin your relationship if you don't get a grip on it.
As talaniman suggested, maybe you need some one to talk to.
Have you been heartbroken in the past by someone else, or is this your first girl friend?

What you guys mean insecure? Its my job to ask questions though I want to know who she's with and what she does... ive been heartbroken by her before and that's why I'm scared its going to happen again... its not my first girlfriend either... just when she was dating her ex she cheated on him with me how do I no that won't happen just vis versa.. I seen her tonight with all her friends and she acts in front of them as if were not even dating and is not even concerned with what I dooo.. like I'm always asking her questions but she never ask me any... iunno when its me and her I'm in heaven its just she's a party girl and I get worried when she goes to these parties...

So you are insecure about the relationship. She cheated on him with you so you're not sure if she will cheat on you. There is no trust, and all the questions and doubts will destroy what you have. Does she know you have all these doubts?

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Originally Posted by Jermone123

Noo aha guys its not that im insecure its just maybe im being overprotected and i have been faithful and have never cheated....where finally steady in this relatonship and i dont wanna loose her.. she says she still has feelings for her ex but they been done for 2 years..and i can understand that cause not everyone gets over there exs...maybe i dont trust her...how do i get that trust?

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You either trust her or you don't. If she says she still has feelings for him and she has a history of cheating, I can understand your feelings.
Does she know how you feel?

I tell her I trust her but I guess I really don't... how do I get that trust?. and tonight how she acted.. it was like she didn't even want me to be with her that's how I felt?. should I be mad or just let little stuff like that goo iunno I've just been really confused lately

I don't think you should let it go. I think you should be honest with her. You don't trust her and she should know that. If she is acting indifferent to you, it could mean she may be doing what you think , or it could be all of your questions are bothering her, especially if you are telling her you trust her.
Be honest with her, and if you feel she is not being honest with you, let her go. You are stressed and it's not worth it IMO

Kk so tell her how I been feeling?. its so hard to let her go though that's the thing as gay as it soundsim falling in love with her... do you no how I can start to develop that trust?

You can't be falling in love, and not have trust developing. That makes no sense and I think its more a dependence than love, which is not healthy at all.

Without some personal help, I honestly think your shortchanging yourself, and are not finding out what it is about yourself, that keeps you from coping with your own feelings in a positive way. Until you do, how can you expect to get a clear picture of what your seeing and deal with it? How are you going to trust and be honest in this relationship. You will frustrate yourself, and her, and that's never good.