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-   -   I think my boyfriend is gay (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=230450)

  • Jun 24, 2008, 07:56 PM
    naoter777
    I think my boyfriend is gay
    Hi everyone. I need help with something that has been bugging me for years. I'm in a relationship with my boyfriend now for 5 years. For the first 4 years I was always finding porn on his computer which I got used to. But about 2 years ago I had found child porn on his computer. So I tried to do the right thing and told the cops for my children's sake. Anyway he went to court and he got away with it. So I'm trying to deal with that at the moment. Anyway every time I found porn I use to found gay porn. I confronted him about it and denies about being bi curious and goes off his tree about it.

    When we would have sex he would do some odd things. What I'm about to say here might upset people but I need help from other people. We will be in the middle of having sex and he will want me to play with his anal which I do then he might quite a bit on my chest which looks like be he hasn't fully yet. So he then licks up some and starts kissing me with it in his mouth. Does this mean he's gay?? I get a bit put off by it. Am I being paranoid? Please help! :confused:
  • Jun 25, 2008, 08:43 AM
    tsila1777
    Girl, dump that man, if only for the safety of your children and find a decent man or live alone. Better to be alone and learn contentment, then to live with just any old thing you can drag home.

    Broken hearts mend, broken children never do.

    Just because you "love" someone doesn't mean you 'have' to be with them. Or that you will never love again. Sometimes change is so scary, we live with what we've got instead of looking for something that could be so much better.

    Make good decisions that are not based on emotions alone, and good things will happen.

    I know this is introduction page... so hello, I'm Tsila. And that's my advise. I hope you give it quality attention.
  • Jun 27, 2008, 12:35 AM
    tsila1777
    A dozen emails telling me 'someone' responded to my comment... I follow the link, but I see no responses... help?
  • Jun 28, 2008, 09:35 AM
    talaniman
    Him being gay is not your problem but that he makes you uncomfortable is what you have to deal with. I think you must evaluate yourself and find out why your putting up with this if your not happy with it.

    The fact you took him to court, but still engage in sex with him, is not a very good indication of good judgement on your part.
  • Jun 28, 2008, 10:28 AM
    Fr_Chuck
    Let me see you are so worried about child porn that you report him, and you stay with him, sorry he is not the one with the worst problems, you were concerned over your children and you call the police, why did you even talk to him, see him or get near him again. You need to get into counseling very quickly to see why you are doing this type of behavior.

    And you stop seeing him, talking to him, and don't even worry about him.

    He has deep sexual issues, and is most likely a child molester in the works if not already one that you are not aware of. He needs help but you need to get out
  • Jun 28, 2008, 10:44 AM
    Allheart
    The least of your problems is if your "boyfriend" is gay. If he has child porn on his computer, this does not make him gay, but very very sick. And as long as you keep him in your life, it is your problem. He has huge issues far more then you can help him with.

    Child porn is a dangerous indication of very sick and unhealthy behaviour. This should alarm you and you did the right thing in calling the authorities, now complete the process and not have him in your life. If you insist that he be in your life, then do the right thing again and make sure he gets the help he needs so that his unhealthiness does not spill into your life and the life of your children.

    You are not seeing this as clearly as you should. Give this some deep and serious thought.
  • Jun 28, 2008, 10:54 AM
    westnlas
    Are you hoping he is ? Or that he may be a bisexual ? Perhaps because you would like to bring another male into the relationship? I am not judging you, but it seems strange that you would still be with him if any of this really offended you. Or that he would still be with you after you betrayed him to the police.

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