Hi...
I Need some advise!

~ I have joined custody of my 2 kids [3 yrs & 7yr old] with their father.
~ I have a restraining order against the kids father
~ He gets the kids every other weekend

On Sat 6/7 his weekend w/the kids he called my cell phone several times [which he is not suppose to do] and threaten my fiancé with cutting his hands off and F*** him up also told him to pass me a message [he claims that my fince hits my son].
I went down to the police station & made a report & so did my fiancé. There is now a warrant for his arrest because he contact me when he was not suppose to. The Kids father found out that there was a warrant for his arrest so on 6/8 when the kids were dropped off he sent his girlfriend to make a report against my fiancé & I.

Now today 6/20 is his weekend with the kids again & I refuse to bring the kids over because the warrant has not been served and I'm afraid he might get arrested while with my kids. What happens then?
Im I wrong for not giving him the kids? I'm worried about my kids being over w/him
Would I get in trouble w/the judge because I'm concern for my kids well being?

Please give me advise as today is the date that the girlfriend probably come with the grandfather & the police to get my kids from my house...

Does your restraining order address the children at all?

Not really sure what you mean. The restraining order is against him for domestic violence.

Well, I am researching this and from what I am reading the restraining order MAY also cover the children unless it is stated otherwise.

So, I wanted to see if anything is outlined about them.

It's basically states that "both parties have joint custody of the children" & "that he has them every other weekend & every other holiday"

The restraining order states this? Or the custody papers?

What state do you live in?

The restraining order states it & I live in NJ.

Do you have a "no contact order"?

I am sorry for so many questions, I am just trying to find the best answer for you.

If I were in your situation, I would not send my children. There is a warrant out for his arrest. If the police show up at your house to get them - let them know that there is a warrant out. If he is going to be spending the night in jail, you don't want the kids subjected to that.

If you don't know if the kids are included - Monday morning, go to the courthouse and have them added. You can request temporary full custody while this is being worked out. You will have to explain why you want this. Or you can request supervised visits.

No problem...

Yes, no contact @ all not even e-mail, the 3rd party person is the grandfather & he can only contact me when he has to ask me something about the kids, I also had to take the kids father MOTHER to court because she assaulted me while I was 5 months pregnant w/my fiancé.

I went down to the court house the Monday after the incident and put in for supervised visitations & risk assessment, my court date is on the 27th. I explained to the police why I was not turning the kids over and all they could say is that it does not matter about the warrant because I have a court order to turn the kids over every other weekend. UNBELIEVEBLA!!

*** 1 more thing I forgot to mention in RETALIATION for my fiancé & I putting charges on the kids father he sends dyfs to my house & tells them that we abuse the kids ***

Well, if you aren't abusing your kids you have nothing to worry about.

I would imagine that children services sees this kind of thing all the time. One parent is mad and who do they call?
More than likely, they will come out and do a home visit, ask a lot of questions and then say have a nice day.

So was he able to get the kids today? Does he have them now?

You haven't said, but do your kids tell you how they are treated at daddy's house? A 7 year old will - I have a 7 year old and she will tell you anything you want to know.

Is the dad nice to the kids? Does he yell or hit or anything that would make you think they are unsafe? I know he is threaten you, but does that carry over to the children?

Cops just came and said if I do not turn them over I can get asrrested... they don't even care that there is awarrent out for his arrest.

This system is so corrupted!!

Hello Ra:

You need to follow the court orders. You can't decide that you think better than a judge. You can be held in contempt of court, or you could lose something of value should your ex take you back to court, and it looks like you guys are going to be in court for a long, loooong time. Judges don't like people to override their orders.

excon

It sounds like game playing to me. You face losing custody if you don't let him have the kids for the weekend if by court order he is supposed to have them. Your walking on thin ice so be very careful. The children aren't a weapon. As far as the no contact goes then how could it be joint custody if your never speaking to him ?

Naw, cops are lying at this point, if you don't let him have the kids, he can take you back to court, and the judge can decide, but no the police can not do anything at that point, Sounds like he has some friends on the police force that is lying for him, Real police officers will tell you that it is a civil matter and most certain will not scare you,

Call their supervisor and report them for what they came and tell you, I bet they will be in trouble and may even have to come and tell you they are sorry.

It is real easy, he has to take the custody, you don't have to turn them over to his girlfriend, so take a police officer with you to arrest him when he is there for the kids.

Now if he takes you back to court for not letting him have the kids, the judge can find you in contempt but if you know exactly where he is and hwen he is gong to be there, and he has a warrant, just get him arrested