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-   -   2 years and still not sure if I want this relationship (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=228011)

  • Jun 17, 2008, 11:00 PM
    Rezzend83
    2 years and still not sure if I want this relationship
    Ive been dating this girl for to a little over 2 years, I think I love her but I'm not sure if I'm ready for the level of relationship that I should be in. I'm now a senior in high school and I've been having a real hard time the last few weeks because I don't know if I really want to be in this relationship. I know she loves me, she treats me like I'm the most important thing in the world, and I feel bad a lot about it because I don't do the same for her, she is cmpletely set on the relationship and is in it for the long haul, should I stay with her? I don't want to have so many questions and end up doing something that would hurt her more in the end because of it but I'm afraid that if I leave that shell never forgive me.
  • Jun 17, 2008, 11:47 PM
    JBeaucaire
    If you leave her with no warning, she will be very hurt and probably never forgive you.

    Is that enough reason to stay with a girl you don't want to be with anymore essentially wasting her time and yours? No, you can't avoid truth.

    Becoming a grownup means confronting tough/painful situations. Children hide. You're not a child, neither is she, you have to be honest, she has to hear it.

    The breakup is inevitable, you know that. The sooner you do it, the sooner it is behind you and she is free to start hating you and healing and eventually getting over you. SHE has to go through that, that is her burden to bear, not yours.

    You both need to learn how to do this, so the breakup will lead to more experience you both need anyway. Might as well dive in.
  • Jun 17, 2008, 11:53 PM
    Simple Asian
    if you not too sure about the relationship... you shouldn't even start it in the beginning..

    as in any relationship... communicated is the key to anything.. so if you and her can sit down and talk it would be the best to talk about it and how to get out the best of it

    as a matter if you plannig to leaving her ? Do it as soon as possible... dont think that you already drag it 2 years.. and a little later won't matter... yup it matter

    the longer you being with a girl the more trust they put in you and the more attach they get to you.. (if they really like you started with if you no what I mean)

    it wasting you time and also her time to find a new person... that love her back ^^ >.. so think about it
  • Jun 18, 2008, 04:24 AM
    N0help4u
    At 18 it is probably a large part of feeling you should be having your independence to 'find yourself' and having someone to be there for can make you feel tied down somewhat.
    You don't want to burn your bridges by breaking up if it is a really good relationship so
    As long as you are not wanting to date others but have some independence apart from your relationship maybe what you need is more time to yourself and your interests.
    If you really don't want to be with her then you need to tell her but if you just need more 'me' time just find time for both. Eventually you will know for sure if you want to break up or not. For now I don't think you should give up a good thing unless you really don't see the two of you working out in the long run.
    Definitely do not go to the next level in your relationship because, if anything, you need to digress a step.

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