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-   -   Am I being clingy (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=227996)

  • Jun 17, 2008, 09:49 PM
    Hmmmm
    Am I being clingy
    My girlfriend feels I'm clinging to her because I want to do things together and she wants to go out with her friends. However, its been weeks now since we have done anything together besides calling each other. So should I just keep let her being with her friends?(am I being clingy) Or should I also be given time to spend with her not on the phone
  • Jun 17, 2008, 11:25 PM
    mommas_girl
    No your not being clingy, but your getting close to it.. I use to do that to my finacee and it got me no where.. just let her be with her friends and tell her in advance that you want to go out and do something as a couple..
  • Jun 17, 2008, 11:56 PM
    JBeaucaire
    You may be being clingy, you may not. Your message was brief so we can't really vote on that too accurately.

    But let me remind you that the point of dating is to measure the habits, likes, routines and effects of your love interest on you. You're measuring your compatibility. Almost every time you measure honestly, you will end up deciding you two aren't compatible. The relationships will end over and over again for one reason or another.

    All of this is perfectly normal and should not be avoided. Keeping bad relationships together just because you "like each other' or are "used to each other" always ends even more badly.

    No, you keep ending relationships until one day you are "measuring" someone who keeps coming up positive. Their habits, their hobbies, their lifestyle, the way they enhance your life while still having one of their own, the way you are more proud of them than not... all of those things will signal you may have found "the one".

    Notice how finding "the one" wasn't about measuring love? Love is instinctual. You wouldn't be dating someone you didn't already have the instinctual attraction to, right? Part of the measuring is in that department, too, but most of it is in all the other big and little details that makeup how you each lead your lives.

    So, clingy or not, I already measure you two as coming to then end of your experiment. What do you think?
  • Jun 17, 2008, 11:56 PM
    Simple Asian
    girls need space and if the girls you dating is independent then you you need to give her time and space...

    try to let her do her own things for a while... and you go do your thing.. go work out.. having fun with your friends... guys night out ///. You have your life too you no..

    your girlfriend is not your life.. well just not yet right ? ^^... and when the time is right she will come back to you because she miss you ^^ >..

    THINK ABOUT IT ^^
  • Jun 18, 2008, 04:07 AM
    N0help4u
    Two weeks and she is not attempting to spend any time with your?
    Possibly it is her habit to 'go out with the girls' and it could possibly be what you can always expect with her. Or maybe she is just not all that into you. Does she reassure you in any way that she is really into you?
    She may be backing off because she felt you were too clingy. She may just need some space. If she is not willing to discuss your relationship and where she wants it to go maybe you should just use this time to do things you want and not call her let her call you. If she senses that maybe she might be losing you because you show as little interest in her maybe her tune will change. If it doesn't change maybe she really isn't all that into you.

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