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-   -   Divorced but stayed together (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=226911)

  • Jun 14, 2008, 07:16 PM
    Kimba-lee
    Divorced but stayed together
    I was divorced in 1989 but we stayed together till last July 2007. Everything was in his name. We bought a house I put down 1/2 the down payment and always worked and raised the kids. He did nothing around the house. Never lifted a finger. I also put several large chunks of money from settlements into the house. Now he has a girlfriend and he won't give me anythu=ing. I went back to get my thngs and he called the police. What do I do? I don't have money for an attorney. He has all the money and our house and our condo.
  • Jun 14, 2008, 07:26 PM
    Fr_Chuck
    Why did you stay, and leave everything in his name, You will need an attorney, so find one to work on payments or something.
  • Jun 14, 2008, 07:32 PM
    westnlas
    There isn't much you can do legally. Learn from your mistakes and move on. Unfortunately, I don't think an attorney would do you much good at recovering any money from him. He has it all in his name, so really, it does belong to him. Giving someone money is just that, a gift. If you loan them money, you get a promissory note. Good luck.
  • Jun 14, 2008, 07:41 PM
    Kimba-lee
    I stayed because we had twins. I felt I had a responsibility to them. My ex was physically and psycologically abusive. I finally left after the twins left for college and he started abusing me again. Now he won't even let me have any of my things. Also, he is turning the kids against me telling them I am trying to ruin him financially when in reality he is running up all his credit cards buying crap for the new girlfriend. I stayed with this jerk for 23 years.
  • Jun 18, 2008, 06:31 PM
    twinkiedooter
    Can you prove that you put the 1/2 of the downpayment on the condo? What about the "chunks of money from settlements"? If you can prove this financial contribution you will probably be getting this back. Definitely get an attorney involved in this if you are talking substantial amounts of money.
  • Jun 18, 2008, 07:49 PM
    westnlas
    Hell Yes! You absolutely need to at least consult an attorney. I just meant that if it's gone, you may need to accept that and start over. Hey starting over isn't too bad, I've had plenty of practice at it. Anyway, call a local attorney for a consultation. The first visit is usually without charge as it is to see what your case is. You can find out your options, the projected costs, payment plans, etc at that time. Good luck, and I'll add a prayer for you.
  • Jul 4, 2008, 04:04 PM
    George_1950
    Just curious: did you purchase the house before or after the divorce? "Fool me once, shame on you; fool me twice, shame on me."
  • Jul 4, 2008, 07:01 PM
    talaniman
    Talk to an attorney, consultation can be free. You may have child support, alimony, and if the house was purchased during the marriage, you may be entitled to half. Stop assuming, guessing, and fretting, and seek the advice of a professional.

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