How so I make my 28yr old husband realize that on his days off from work that he can't spend his day playing W.O.W or any other computer game all day and help me out around the house or watch the kids with out our 2yr old going out the slider door when I am upstairs doing laundry? He doesn't think that because he is watching him that I should hold him responcible because it is his day off and I should realize that he should not have to watch our 2 children who are 2 and 7 months old.

Hello k:

You can't make him do anything. You could try talking about stuff that really matters to you, but he he doesn't want to, you can't make him

excon

And again he did not just wake up yesterday like this, it is issue of most likely him not being real responsible since the child is born,

Make out a list of duties he has to help with, have him sign it, explain he is now a father and has to do father things, go out sometimes and leave him alone with the child to make him understand what watching is all about

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Originally Posted by excon

Hello k:

You can't make him do anything. You could try talking about stuff that really matters to you, but he he doesn't wanna, you can't make him

excon

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I didn't mean to have it sound as in make make him. But to try to.

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Originally Posted by keely123

I didn't mean to have it sound as in make make him. but to try to.

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Marriage is a two way street you should not have all the burdens of home as he might get a day off during the week but when do you? If you don't you might want to bring that up as raising a 2 and 7 month old child is a lot of work for one person and being neglected in this manner will only lead to more issues as you will start feeling contempt for his actions.

Talk to him, come up with a contract together and sign it as a couple stipulating the work that has to be done around the house and life obligations. Basically go back and work on the communication between you two.

Leave the toddler with him once in a while while you and baby 'run and errand'. You can just drive to the park. Just leave him with the toddler for little bits of time and increasingly bigger, then start leaving the baby with him too. Make up an excuse if you have to. Instead of 'asking' hubby to watch the child, bring the child to the hubby and tell the child, "Daddy's going to play with you for a while while mommy goes ______". It would probably be harder for him to tell his child "No, I don't want to play with you". Then it is for him to tell you he doesn't want to watch the child. Maybe your husband will be a bit less afraid to take responsibility after a while if you just give him no choice. Good luck.

Just the opinion of a former working father, how about instead of wanting him not to have an off day, get one of your own. Let grandma see the kids, and you take your own day off. Do your toes or frollick in the park, whatever you want. Or leave the kids with Dad, and frollick in the park.

Either way it's on you to manage your time.