Well today my lesbian Partner came home from work and was all sweetness and light and then got changed in her best clobber and disappeared again. I feel very loney and empty inside and I am asking myself how much more can I take.
She says she loves me, she does not want to break up (to many factors to consider i.e the house our daughter, finances) but she does not want me near her in her space (but we still sleep in the same bed) nor does she want me to be with her when she goes to Art exhibitions(private previews_ or the monthly meeting we used to attend. What's wrong with her is it the menopause, does she love me so much so she has to hurt me?
Used to to most things together apart from a few we did apart to give each other space. What is this about.?

Sounds like she either feels like you are cramping her style, or she is no longer feels comfortable with the lesbian image, or she is interested in someone else or something.
You can't change her back so probably the only thing you can do until you work it out is to get out and have a life on your own.

Maybe your putting too much on what she should be doing for you, and not enough of what you should be doing for yourself.

Depending on her for your happiness is not wise. As said in your other post, working things out, and getting on the same page, may take time. And it takes two.