Hope this isn't a repeat.
This guy is skydiving for the first time. After he jumps out of the plane he counts to 10, pulls the ripcord and nothing happens. Only a tad worried, he pulls the reserve cord but still, nothing happens. As he is plummeting to the Earth, he sees a woman coming up the other way. He shouts to her, "Know anything about parachutes?" "No!" she replies, "do you know anything about gas stoves?"
