My older brother is nearly 50 and an alcoholic. As such, his income isn't terrific, but he makes enough to pay rent and afford his bar tabs. I own a livery company and do pretty well, but I work very hard to keep things running. For about the past 5 years, my brother has been sending his 22 year-old daughter over to my company mechanic whenever her car breaks down. He never asks me, just tells his daughter "your uncle's mechanic will fix your car." and she shows up. This puts my mechanic in the awkward position of having to call me to okay the work and me in the awkward position of having to pretend I knew she was coming. My niece is a single mother and works minimum wage jobs to make ends meet.

I love my niece very much but my brother is making me crazy. What's more, I've happily fixed my neice's car several times over but my mechanic has a whole fleet of vehicles he has to keep running, and I just can't keep doing this anymore. Like I said, my brother never asks me and never offers a dime.

How do I put a stop to this without looking like the bad guy in my neice's eyes?

In my opinion, if your niece is twenty-two and self-supporting, your issue is with her, not her father. If you're unable to keep her cars running, tell her. She's a big girl and needs to grow up. Her responsibilities are only going to get greater with the passage of time.

Your issues with your brother are a whole 'nother story.

How heartless this poor young lady HAS AN ALCOHOLIC father imagine what her life wasn probably like... I usually don't respons to questions I just ask but reading this story and reading the response makes me sad. This young lady is 22 yrs old working a minimum wage job by herself. From the question I can only guess the nieces dad probably has THROUGH out her whole life not offered her any (or very little) financial help since she was little. Girl probably has had to support herself since she was little practically. Most people her age (my age) can go to their parents for financial help when they really needed it. In my case I was in college and my mom paid for everything and I very much appreciate it but this poor girl maynot be in college because she couldn't afford it (scholarships don't pay for EVERYTHING when it comes to college) or she's working her poor little butt off to pay for it herself. She goes to her dad to help her fix her car and he more tha likely tells her "your aunt said shed fix it" or "get your aunt to fix it and ill pay her back" he's not going to say he can't help her because he spends his money on alcohol and whatever else. Im not saying that the aunt should fix the girls car for free forever but I'm also saying have a little heart here. Think about this can you go to your parents for financial help if you just had no other option? I know I could... this poor girl it sounds like cannot.

I think you should speak to both of them together about this maybe you could work out a payment plan WITH HER where you fix her car and she can pay you for it monthly if possible she may not even know that this is an issue she may think you are OK with it.

Tell her before she breaks down again that you are not able to fit that work in any longer and that is not fair to the mechanic because he has to fit her in and then work at a faster pace to get the work done that you depend on him to do.
Maybe give her a recommendation of someone that does good work for a fair price.
I'd think that is more than you have an obligation to do.

She's taking advance of you because its wrong just to depend on you and take her car there without asking you first to ask your permission. She will continue to do this unless you put your foot down. She's an adult and should know how to dial your number instead of just doing what she wants. I would have a talk with her asap and set some rules and let her know her behavior is childish.

Your brother don't care and it seems no matter what you say, it will fall on deaf ears. He see nothing wrong and might feel you owe him, but sadly he will seek help because this been his lifesytle for years and is used to it and loves it.

The only thing you can do is try to get through to your niece and if she don't like it, ooh well. How would she be getting her car fix if you didn't have what you work hard at.

Thank you all who answered. :D

Ok, guess I will go against the stream here, as a father of 4 now grown boys, my home was a full time mechanic shop for ever teen I think lived in town at times, we exchanged motors, put in rear ends and more, and before that it was bikes for them before cars. I helped them all because I wanted to be a model of what a man is suppoe to be like,

And this is your niece, I would say explain to her that you can't always fix it and that as she grows she needs to become responsible, but personally I would help my niece esp if she is trying hard, working and doing the right things. Show her a good example of a man, her dad was not one.