Hello. I was wondering if anyone could give me some guidance. For the longest time I've wanted to serve my country, after September 11th my will became greater. I am a senior in high school and for the better half of the year I had been fixed on enlisting into the Marines right after I graduated. After months of arguing with my parents and relatives I just gave in and am now all signed up at the University of Northern Iowa. Every day I feel resentment towards my parents. It is my life and I seriously need time away from Iowa and academics. I've told them how I fell, but they don't care. All they say is, "they will train you to kill!" I don't want you dying for those ******. They are all brainless, that is why they call them jarheads, are you willing to take a bullet for them". And so on. It angers me very much. I want to serve because of the sacrifice previous generations and our own. I also want the title of Marine. What should I do? I do want to go to college and will. Its not like I'm not, I would just be waiting 4 years until I'm out of the Corps. I know I could wait until I graduate college, but I would be an NCO, plus I don't feel I can wait that long. Or I could go through OCS but I don't want to be an officer. I want to experience it from the very bottom, and work up.

Anyway this is eating me up inside. Do you know anyone who was in my situation and what course they went?

Thank you.

Why don't you want to be an officer, the pay is much better, and they still teach you to kill. ( seriously they teach you to kill)

Your parents don't believe in the war we are in, and perhaps not in war at all. Sadly if too many people believe that way, soon we won't fight and end up being taken over by some other nation.

So why not go into the ROTC program, you get your college paid for and graduate an officer and in the military. As a Lt you will be right there with your troops in the fight.

No matter if you are an officer or enlisted, after so many years you will promote up to a rank and also get too old to be active in the front with the troops. My son is about there now, After about 12 years he has saw about every where the Middle East has to show, He was on the ground in Bagdad when they went in and went door to door. But a time comes when you can't, and if the only skill you have is kiling, living off the land and following orders, not much of a choice.

So I would say if you can get into a ROTC program go for it.

I was an officer and you can't ask for a better position in service.

Hi Patriot87-Im sorry to hear about the situation your in. On one hand I can empathize with your family in not wanting you to go, but I would be more concerned about you being killed rather than you killing someone else or being labeled as a "jar head"--that notion I don't understand.

But despite what your families feelings are about this, you are an adult and someone that can make adult decisions. You obviously know what becoming a Marine is going to entail and it sounds like your ready to do it. Its your life,hun, if this is a strong desire that you have in your heart than do what you need to do even if it means having your family disappointed in you. This is for you not them. College will always be there. You can go back anytime you want.

All Im saying is if this is torment for you then you won't be happy until you do this. Good luck to you, I hope it works out in the end.

Wow! What a question. My jaw is on the desk. Not because of the context of the question, but because of the maturity of the concept.Well delivered. A bit shocking, or maybe more sombering, but filled me with pride of our youth.

I feel the need to cut to the chase. Ask all the advice you can, look hard at all sides, weigh the pros and cons, collect every piece of info available, and ask for opinoins. But the fact is the decision is solely up to you.

Make a decision based on the path that will satisfy you. That is what is great about this country, the freedom to do as you see fit, legally of course.

I am a bit envious also, I was not , shall I say, wide awake enough to see the opprotunities available to me at that age. But I do feel sorrowful that you must deal with emotions over the parents. Cannot say I blame them. Consider what their sacricfice will be for them.

Being a dad for three myself, I cannot imagine the pain a parent feels losing a son or daughter, or maybe I never think about it intentionally.

The choices that have you waiting seem to have their benefits, however your insistence to start from the bottom is refreshing, and admired. We need to remember that the pictures we have in our minds of our young adults are the minority and the majority are fine young men like yourself.

Since no matter which path you take seems to end up with you in our military, I salute you. I hope I have helped a bit to at least get you to think it out the best you can, and take the path makes the most sense to you.

Partiot87
I can understand, believe me. I dropped my son off at the MEPS just a week ago for his journey to Parris Island. Even though I have retired from the military I (and his mother) were dead sent against him going. I fear for him in these times. But, as he told me " I don't want to grow old and wonder WHAT IF", so he's gone. With our full support. YOU DO NOT have to join the military to show your patriotism. It is a noble calling, but not for everyone. You can learn a trade in the Marines, but usually if you want to join the Marines (versus a different branch of the military) it is for reasons other than learning a trade. And I don't mean to learn to kill. Usually something inside just make it feel like it's the right thing to do. William (my son) had the same feelings about wanting to advance from the bottom up, felt he'd be a much better leader that way. There are programs to advance to officer from the enlisted ranks, not easy, but can be done. PM me if you have any questions. I do not want to you to think that I THINK JOINING IS GREAT. Each person has to make their own decision.

Thank you all for your replies.



I can see that my parents are very worried about me. Some days they had tears in their eyes on the thought of me joining. I haven’t said a word about it for a month or two now, and to tell you the truth I am terrified of bringing it up again, very terrified.

klmgb ~ "YOU DO NOT have to join the military to show your patriotism."

My dad has told me the same thing, and I know it is true :) Being patriotic is much more than just military service, it's just the manner I myself want to do it.

tkrussell,
My father had me speak to some military guys he knew. One was an Army officer in the Airborne, another was an enlisted Marine who went to college and became an Officer in the Rangers, and he also became a Ranger helicopter pilot who just so happened to be apart of the Mogadishu conflict. All of them were very interesting and I took their advice seriously. Basically what it boiled down to was there are more opportunities as an officer, which didn’t surprise me. This didn’t change me though.

Fr Chuck,
The reason I don’t want to be an officer is because;

My college does not provide a Navy ROTC where I can pick the Marine option, it only has Army ROTC. I honor the Army as well, I know they are just as honorable and yes they don’t get enough credit, but I want to be a Marine.
I'm really not planning on joining the Marines for the benefits. No doubt going the officer route is smart, like Fr Chuck said, better pay, and it is just as honorable as enlisting. Although If I was going for benefits I would go Air Force and there would be absolutely nothing wrong with that. I want to go for the service, the experience, and adventure. I know some days I may be cold, hot, wet, tired, hungry, fet up, wish I never joined, but that won't matter, I know some of these thing will come, its apart of "service".

bizygurl, I feel exactly how you described it, I will be tormented until I do it. I do believe disappointing my parents is the way this will go. Trying to speak in a logical manner with them doesn’t work.

Thank you all again on your insight. This stuff has been building up inside me and it feels like I’m releasing a little pressure.

I personally think this war, and just about all of them are a little ridiculous.

Do you worship money? Is it your God? Will money guide a war that thousands die in? Remember what your fighting for when it comes to Iraq amigo. (Note: My brother is in Iraq for the 5th time right now).

My point is that currently our country fights for things that are loosely defined and commonly lied about. I live in NY and felt 9-11 just as hard as anyone, but Iraq DID NOT BOMB US! Whatever your reasons for fighting are they are not why we are there.

Personally if you do want to join, go to school first so you're an officer when you get in. Look into tuition re-imbersment and what-not, or reserves.

So conclusion, really... REALLY look at the reasons we are at war and decide if out gov't is in this war for the good of the people (Oh and I mean the people of our country, which if true, means we should've left Iraq before we got in) Our national debt cap was just raised to $9 TRIL. Because of Katrina and Iraq. That doesn't sound like good of our country.

Oh and Chuck I think it was...

We don't have to invade other countries to stop ourselves from being taken over. We could've spent all the money that we wasted in Iraq on paying for domestic security and NOT going to war. Imagine paying 30,000 troops everyday to guard our planes, trains and buses. Doesn't that sound more secure than sending all those resources to another country?

Yeah, that's how you don't get taken over, by making intelligent decisions and our commander-in-chief is in no position to make decisions on lunch let alone national security.

JC

I must have missed this question when it first came out... :)

I believe that military service is never a mistake (in a free country, anyway!).

Others point out the benefits of education, learning a trade skill, and advancement opportunities that are available.

I believe that the military is the only place some people can learn the skills to become a “person of quality”. Self-control, self-respect, team building, honor, courage, sacrifice … These are skills taught through military service.

A standing military force – especially like the US military – is absolutely necessary and a stabilizing factor on the world. The particular situation in Iraq, you may or may not agree with.

HI,
At 64 yrs old, married 29 yrs, with 3 college degrees, and now retired, I would personally advise anyone to go to college first. College is a place of growing, learning who you are, making friends, becoming more wise, in the sense that one learns more, being able to make better decisions.
After graduation, you would then be in a better position to decide what to do.
There is absolutely nothing wrong in wanting to serve your Country! Serving one's country can be done in many ways, not just joining the Military. At any rate, please wait to join the Marines, until you have a little more "life" under your belt.

Hi all,

I thought I would give an update on my situation. Not one day has passed without me thinking about military service.

I plan on enrolling in Army ROTC at my university, and also being apart of the Marine PLC program in the summer, both which are officer programs. I will get a feel for both services and take it from there.


jc105, I thank your brother for his service. Geezz 5 times, is he a Marine?

I agree with you that this war is not right and seems to have made the hate for the U.S. grow. But... I have always wanted to join the military.
What almost all of the guys, and gals serving in combat say is they are fighting for each other. They aren't fighting for Bush or the politicians, it's for the guy next to you. So I guess why I want to join is for the brotherhood and to support those poor guys stuck over there like your brother.

"Imagine paying 30,000 troops everyday to guard our planes, trains and buses. Doesn't that sound more secure than sending all those resources to another country?"

(According to Bush... ) We invaded Iraq for WMD's. We were'nt worried about being over run, we were worried about Saddam giving a nuke to a terrorist to come here are kill Americans. Now obviously a mistake was made, which is incredibly unacceptable. Using National Guard troops to guard isn't a bad Idea, but you just can't be in every spot. Sometimes you have to fight at the source.

HI,
Thank you for posting back, and letting us know how you feel, and your decisions. It's very nice to hear from you.
Bush's approval rating is now lower and lower and lower; many different reasons; Iraq being one of the primary ones.
I sincerely hope you are not sent over there. Approx. 25% of those returning have mental problems, diagnosed by Military Doctors. But, unfortunately, only about 1 in 5 of those are actually called back for help by the Fed. Gov't, and doctors! This info from the CNN Network news.
Our Fed. Gov't Veterans programs are really, really bad; not doing enough; not paying enough, taking care of widows and widowers! If this is what you intend to go through, I do wish you the very, very best. I get brochures everyday, through the US Mail, asking for more donations to the Paralyzed Veterans of America organization, and I can only donate so much. Maybe you can make a difference in the way our Federal Government, and the top Military persons, treat our Veterans, of any war.

Don't listen to your parents about that. If you want to go in the Marines, do it. Do whatever you want to do. :)

Emily

I have an 18yo son who is dermined to join the Marines. I am a former Marine. I'm sure that has something to do with his decision and the fact that his whole life he heard me speak highly of my service and the Marinc Corps. Our only SUGGESTION to him is to check out the other branches. They may have a better offer for him.
The way I see it. He is old enough to make his own decisions. I may not agree but I support him. The mentality that we(parents) need to forever giide our children is not entirely correct. I give advice and guidance when mt son asks. He has to learn how to make decisions for HIS life.
The hardest thing I found when I joined was that no one understood. They could not. They were unable and unwilling. Some of US have such a strong patriotic desire to sevive our country. I say to "Thank you for your patriotism".
Consider what our freedon would be like if everyone that got resistance for enlisting stayed home? Those around you would change their mind real quick and ask you to go out and get our FREEDOM back...

I say YOU make an intellegent and well informed decision. Then act on it. EVERYONE will respect you in the end. (they di for me when I feturned.)

Semper Fi,
Terry:cool:

Perhaps this story will help:

My little brother was battling the same decision after high school. He ended up going to college to study electrical engineering (like my father.. . ) but was never happy with the decision, and brought up joining the military every Christmas. Finally, after three years and no degree, he followed his heart and joined the Army.

At first, my family was annoyed, anxious, and confused at his decision. I was even a little embarrassed, thinking that military was 'beneath' my family. But now, I know that I couldn't have been more wrong. Even though I'm not 100% excited about the Iraqi war, I am so proud of the man that he has become since he joined up. He is so much happier and more focused. My whole family is proud, waits for his letters anxiously, and brags about his experiences. He's currently training to be a green beret!

I would not Join the Military. I seen fellow soldiers that have been in tours of Iraq. If I could go back I would not of joined. I am in the process of getting out right now. Go to College and finish it man. If they bring back the draft don't be afraid to go then. I sure won't be. But I would never just free willing sign on a contact with any branch of the Military Execpt maybe the Air Force.

Weigh your decision very carefully. There is nothing the military can offer you that you cannot get on the civilian side, except perhaps lies and half truths. Be a patriot and get an education at the same time. What do you want in the end? A family, a job, a career? Military srvice is usually a mistake, those in the military will not admit that they made a mistake and some probably have not realized it yet. If you join, don't let it be a mistake. Do some research on both sides of the issue, not what a recruiter tells you. Try Army National Guard and good luck.

Patriot87

As an Army veteran of 5 1/2 years, and now in Afghanistan as a civilian contractor... I first want to appreciate your desire to serve our country. I have that very same desire, and it hurts me deeply when others downgrade us, our soldiers and go so far as to say they are 'ashamed to live in America'. I am ashamed of those not-so Americans, who cannot look past our president and see what America and its ancestors stand for. I am a true patriot in the respect that I stand for my country through all of the mistakes we have made. No other country is perfect, and no other country gives the support to others like the US does.

OK now that I am done with appreciating you, hehe, I want to advise you to follow where your desire leads you. My whole life I have wanted to be in the military. My dad was in the Navy, but died when I was 4 so I never really knew him, but I wanted to follow him. When it came time for me to graduate high school I was unsure of what to do. This was back in 2000, so the war was not even in site, but people still down talked the military, saying it was for those who couldn't make it through college... whatever. Well I didn't have a desire to go to college, and I didn't want to work at restaurants my whole life, so I enlisted.

That has been the best choice of my whole life. I learned a very valuable and profitable job doing Air Traffic Control. But most of all I learned what it is like to be a soldier, to train and be trained by others with one thing in common- defending our country. I would like to say everyone is as patriotic, but as you can see from Army4life above, some come to hate it cause there is a lot more that goes on. You get lazy NCO's above you, you get discrimination, you get BS duties, and when you become an NCO you will get lazy soldiers and have to give them BS duties... but its just how it is. The Army gave me so much in terms of maturity, knowledge, leadership, confidence, life-time friends, and memories that I will proudly share to my children and grand children someday.

As much as I loved the Army, I realized it was not going to satisfy me for life, or at least I am trying to make sure I can live without it. I am 4 years old, and all of the moving around and others moving etc, its hard to hold a relationship. I know that's probable one of the last things on your mind right now, but as I was turning 23, I felt like I should look into finding a more steady job so that I can fulfill my ultimate dream of having a family. I got out of the Army 7 months ago. The first few months were hard... not having to wake up and do PT in the morning, no more formations, so saluting or giving orders... but as much as I missed a lot of it, I felt relieved that I got out when I did. Not because of the war, but because a lot of people become dependent on the military, and then they don't know how to get out.

Well I ended up taking a contract job with the military, so I am now in Afghanistan among soldiers again, but without all that other BS.

Ok I didn't mean to turn this into a novel... lt me get more to the point... I did what I desired at the moment, and I have absolute no regrets. By taking this job over here, I get to be side by side with my countrymen, yet still plan better for my future. When I leave here I have 50k for college and an excellent job, all from the Army... and with plenty of time to go to college. You can even go to college while enlisted 100% free!

I know the feeling all too well of wanting to have the experience, of wanting to start from the bottom up. Even though going to college first, and being an officer is the wiser choice for a more secure future, I would not give up my choices to change and do it that way. The experience and memories are what is going to make my life and future all that much more rich

So, my advice is; follow your heart, but whatever you decide be sure to give it 100%. If you don't think you can give college 100% cause you desire the military, then I would advise to give the military your 100%, we need true Americans like yourself to give motivation to the rest of the troops.

I would go into the whole dying and fear of war, but I think I have written enough here...

Hooah and Semper Fi

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Originally Posted by Patriot87

Hello. I was wondering if anyone could give me some guidance. For the longest time I've wanted to serve my country, after September 11th my will became greater. I am a senior in high school and for the better half of the year I had been fixed on enlisting into the Marines right after I graduated. After months of arguing with my parents and relatives I just gave in and am now all signed up at the University of Northern Iowa. Every day I feel resentment towards my parents. It is my life and I seriously need time away from Iowa and academics. I've told them how I fell, but they dont care. All they say is, "they will train you to kill!" I dont want you dying for those ******. They are all brainless, that is why they call them jarheads, are you willing to take a bullet for them". And so on. it angers me very much. I want to serve becasue of the sacrifice previous generations and our own. I also want the title of Marine. What should I do? I do want to go to college and will. Its not like im not, I would just be waiting 4 years until im out of the Corps. I know I could wait until I graduate college, but I would be an NCO, plus I dont feel I can wait that long. Or I could go through OCS but I dont want to be an officer. I want to experience it from the very bottom, and work up.

Anyway this is eating me up inside. Do you know anyone who was in my situation and what course they went?

Thank you.

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I wonder how different your desire to enlist would be if you had no protest from your family?

You mention you want the 'title' of a marine - but in reality a marine is not a title. I wonder if what you want, and what you are aiming to do are in fact the same thing.

As a junior in high school myself, and coming from a long family of marines, my brother who got out two years ago, I suffer from the same choice as you. I wish to join the marines to protect the ones I love and care about. Sadly the one person who I love the most doesn't want me to go. In my opinion the marine corps and military life are a great thing. I was considering going to a military college(the citadel) but then I realized that no matter were I go to college it would not be able to offer me what I am looking for in my life.


P.S. any one who says the "marine" isn't a title is dead wrong. It is a life long brotherhood, that one should always be honored to be apart of.

A Marine IS a title and don't let anyone ever tell you anything differently. And it is a proud one to carry. I was a 17 year old recent high school graduate when I went to Marine Corps boot camp. I wouldn't trade my experiences for anything. Yea, it was hard. Yea, it sucked a good portion of the time. Yea, they will teach you things that the civilian sector won't teach you. Yea, you may not agree with some of your leaders, or the way things are done sometimes.
Bottom line is that, given how passionately you write about your desire to serve in the military, you should go for it. Know, however, that it will affect you for the rest of your life; in good ways and bad. I have never regretted the 8 years that I spent in the marines. If you go, never compromise who you are and what you stand for (marines may be known to make questionable decisions under the influence). You are still very impressionable at this age. Choose good friends to spend your off-duty time with, and it will make your service time much more enjoyable.