Mi friend wants to live with her dad but her mom won't let her. She is currently living in New York eith her mother. Her father lives in Maine. At what age can she choose what parent she wants to live with? Can her mother refuse to let her live with her father?? Would she have to go through court?

I'm not sure that there is a set age. But in the teenage years, the court will take the child's desire to live with a certain parent very seriously. How old is your friend?

At 18 the child can decide where they want to live. Before that, they have to live where the court order says they are to live. If she wants to live with her father they father will have to make a motion in court for custody, at court she can testify to what she wants, but the court will still look at what is in the best interest of the child.

In Arkansas the age is 13 I believe. In Nevada I'm thinking its like 10. Look it up online.. that's what I did when I wanted to move in with my dad. I would suggest to your friend to ask her parents if she could go to her fathers house when school lets out for the summer.. she may get there and want to come back. PLUS it will let her mother see if she can even trust both the child and the dad. (which in most cases that is what the problem is anyway.. ) And this would allow them to deiced something before they have to pay court fee's for something they could have resolved at home. You may still have to call the judge so that your friend can have a hearing..

Good luck on it though...

Hi,

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It seem like the answer depends on the State that you live in.In some states, there is a minimum age at which a judge will consider a child's wishes. But in California for instance there is no specific age at which a child may choose which parent they wish to live with. Which is weird because you would think this would be at a higher level of government than state but oh well. Here's a good blog post I found about how the child custody law works here in California.

Issues in Divorce

As fr. Chuck and scott pointed out you at 18 is when the child can decide where they want to live. Before that a judge will hear their testimoney in court but it has to go through court. So if her dad wants her then he needs to petition the court for a change in custody until then yes her mother can tell her no.