Hello, it has been awhile since I have posted here, short story is my ex left a year ago to go back to her ex for a third time (she never got over him and thinks he's changed for the better ) and is planning on marrying him.

The breakup was hard for me and I am now working on myself and even starting to pursue other women, while I still care for my ex very much and would love to be with her again my mindset needs to be that it will never happen even though I know she is having issues with him and I believe he will end up hurting her again, I have been in NC with her for awhile but she called a few weeks ago but left no message, I did not call back, anyway its her birthday in a few weeks and I thought a email to her on that day would be a nice thing to do, or would it be a bad idea ? If I send one will she think I am still hung up on her ? There is some truth to that, she did send me a birthday email a few months back, what should I do ?

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Originally Posted by lynxwizard

while I still care for my ex very much and would love to be with her again my mindset needs to be that it will never happen even tho I know she is having issues with him

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You are still hung up on her. I wouldn't send the email, because if you don't get a response, I think it will push you back and take even longer for you to heal. You're the only one who knows how far you have come, but you want to make sure you don't have to start from square 1.

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Originally Posted by bigbird213

You are still hung up on her. I wouldn't send the email, because if you don't get a response, I think it will push you back and take even longer for you to heal. Your the only one who knows how far you have come, but you want to make sure you dont have to start from square 1.

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He's totally right... Just let it go... Forget about her, stop looking back.. move forward!!

No I would not send her a card because she don't deserve it, let her current boyfriend friends, and family do it.

How you moved on yet to someone else because you seem to emotionally involved with her relaelaionship with her ex that she left you for. Don't worry with what going in her boyfriend because she must like it and if you treated her better than her current boyfriend that she left you for then that tells you want she want.

In closing mark that day off your calendar and don't send her anything not even a birthday card.

Sending her an email on her birthday will only hurt you more.

Besides, she is an EX girlfriend, meaning you need to get over her. That's why we call them an ex. It's a person in the past, not your future. You might care for her but she isn't what's now.

Focus on making you happy. How about lean more towards the woman in your life now. It wouldn't be fair to her if you did send the birthday card to your ex. It just shows that you are weak and selfish.

I think that everyone here is right on track. You are going to rip open old wounds by sending that e-mail. It sounds like you are still healing now, don't punish yourself.

Forget your ex, get out do stuff with your life, get someone else in your life and your ex will be a distant memory trust me!! Remember ex's are ex's for a reason problem is when you aren't with them anymore you tend to only remember the good bits.

Find someone new for god sake, you are wasting your life! Sending e-mails this long after a break up could be deemed as creepy.

Go out this weekend and find someone else!!