My boyfriend and I been together 4 1 yr and I'm 8 months pregnant. I been finding out he watches porn either online or orders then on TV. We already talked about it but because I find out and the last time we decided that he would let me know if he does but he did it again and I found out but he doesn't tell me. That's it mean I'm not enough for him that he needs to look at something better. It just hurts because it just makes me feel fat and ugly

First off--this is an adult board. Please don't use chat speak.

Secondly--men are visual creatures. The fact that he is hiding it from you is a bigger problem than that he looks at it.

Have you told him how much it hurts you? I mean--without putting down what he is doing at all, have you basically said "When you look at porn, it makes me feel like I am fat and ugly at a time in our lives when I feel like I should be the most beautiful woman on earth to you for carrying your child"?

How old are the two of you?

I did let him know how it makes me feel but he says it has nothing to do with me and that he is very satisfied with me. He finally admitted he has an addiction because that's what I told him I think he has but he first asked me if there would ever be a time when he can just watch it and me be o.k with I answered him honestly and I didn't think so, I mean does he really want porn over his family. He asked me to please not leave him and asked me to help him but I don't know how. I'm 21 and he's 28

Like with any other addiction, then, he needs to get help.

You can start with your family doctor, but your boyfriend has to be the one to do the work. He has to be the one to give it up, never go back, do not pass go, do not collect $200.

What you can do is be supportive--it's going to be hard for him. Maybe you can talk to a your doctor or a counselor together to get suggestions on what will work for BOTH of you.

At least he is at home with you. Would you rather him be at home with you, or at home watching porn then out doing the acts for real on somebody else?

I was doing some research on the internet some time ago, and I would recommend that you Google porn addiction and related phrases and learn about the subject. There is a lot of information on this topic.

I also tried to research how sex addicts can get help, but I only ran across Christian websites and their programs. I preferred to learn about how a therapist would define and approach the problem, but I wasn't able to find any articles... and, I didn't want to purchase a book on the topic. You may want to purchase a book by a psychologist.

Knowledge is power. :)

Guys are visual creatures... we like to see naked women. Its how we are.

I degress in that its NOT an addiction. Women like to shop... guys like to savour the female body. Its nothing personal.

Personally which would you rather him do look at a few naked women or drink a few six-packs every day? The former isn't addicted based on your description but the later clearly is.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by smoothy

Guys are visual creatures.......we like to see naked women. Its how we are.

I degress in that its NOT an addiction. Women like to shop....guys like to savour the female body. Its nothing personal.

Personally which would you rather him do look at a few naked women or drink a few six-packs every day? The former isn't addicted based on your description but the later clearly is.

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He's right... men are all the same. :mad: