Why do my husband only show me affection when he wants sex?

Cause men are stupid. NO NO NO. I'm just kidding. Maybe he doesn't realize that he is doing this. Have you talked about it?

Because that's WHY men are affectionate. To get sex. This isn't wrong, it's reality. You are a woman, sex to you is about intimacy and love and showing feelings. At the core, sex to men is about sex. Our brains are wired completely differently in this regard.

So, do NOT punish him for not viewing sex the way you do. He is doing nothing wrong. And you can turn a simple act of pleasure for him into a huge point of contention in your marriage, and you can do it quite easily. Please be careful on this one.

THE GOOD NEWS
Men aren't stupid either. We can be trained. We still need/want the sex "just because", but we can learn how to make it special for you, too. We really can. Just don't make it an all or nothing proposition. Now, work together on the relationship, initiate affectionate scenarios that are not automatically sexual, or in places where sex could even occur. Help him learn. You have all the time in the world, so use it.

TRUTH - you both need the sex. So, giving it to each other for whatever reason is mainly just a good idea.

Affection is something that doesn't come naturally for men, but can be mastered, totally.

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Why do my husband only show me affection when he wants sex?

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What kind of affection are you looking for, and how long have you been married?

The most important thing in a relationship is communication. Have you told him how you feel? Maybe he does not realize the affect that his actions have on you. Although I truly believe that men and women have different ideas as to what sex means to them, it would be unfair to your relationship if you withhold information that could only better your relationship. Tell him that when he does _________ it makes you feel ________. Put the ownership of the problem on both of you so that you are not just pointing the finger at him, which could cause him to become defensive and may take your statement as criticism instead of something that YOU need. Through no fault of their own, some guys just don't know or understand what a woman needs to feel truly wanted and appreciated. TELL HIM what you need and want.

It's not just a man thing. I do the same thing! I get really affectionate when I want to get intimate. Why? Because I want to warm up the mood, sometimes I don't have every second of the day to be under his nose, and being clingy because I have a family but when the kids are asleep or away, I am extremely affectionate usually that is my way to let him know I want it.

Imagine he is not affectionate at all and just want to get it over with, I don't think you would be satisfied just enjoy it. Or if you want him to be affectionate more than communicate that too him.