Hey guys, hope everyone is well. Just had to post this question as it has been a source of disagreement between me and my new wife( 4 months married). An old friend called her and left a message wishing her a happy Mothers Day, he ended the call by telling her that he loved her. I was kind of taken aback by this, my wife explained that they had been friends for 20 years and never dated. I stated that I was not comfortable with another man and my wife exchanging "I love you's", I have no problem with them talking or writing each other I just have the opinion that "love" is something that shouldn't be thrown around.

She went on to say that there are many different types of love and it is perfectly OK to tell this guy she loves him. We eventually agreed to disagree on the subject, but it does come up from time to time. Just wanted to get some other opinions on the matter.

Thanks

Its understandable to feel awkward in this situation, however your wife see's this is a friendly I love you so although you feel funny about it this does not mean anything apart from being friendly with a person. As long as her friend does not have any feelings for her it doesn't matter whether he says I love you. Try and understand it from your wife's perspective maybe you have a close friend that you are very close to. Well that's my opinion for you :)

I can totally see where you are coming from, however, my best friend is a guy, we have been friends for 10 years and we do exchange I love yous and my husband is OK with that. As long as she is being faithful to you, and is in your bed at night... I really would not worry much about it.

It is so important that you stand in your wife's life as a strong, confident, reliable and self-assured man. Things like this need to be non-starters. There are so many REAL marital issues you will face and must win on, wasting energy on nitpicky things like this sends the wrong message to each other.

Now, if you want to promise HER you will never exchange "I love yous" with another woman for any reason, that's your prerogative. Requiring she do the same is needlessly controlling.

Woman are emotional creatures. She will definitely say and mean "I love you" all through her life. But when she says it to you, it means something completely different. You need to be OK knowing the words may be the same, but they mean something WAY more when aimed at you.

Strong, confident, caring, uncontrolling.

Quote:

---

there are many different types of love and it is perfectly OK to tell this guy she loves him.

---

Never start a fight with the wife because your insecure, I do mean never. Addressing an old friend of 20 years with I love you is nothing to worry about. The key, she didn't try to hide it did she? Forget it.

Quote:

---

Strong, confident, caring, uncontrolling.

---

As JB so rightly pointed out, be a strong, confident, husband and your female ain't going nowhere, to do anything to hurt you, trust her, and relax.