hey guys so recently I started working at a local ice cream shop and met this girl there who was cute and outgoing. I met her last Friday when I worked and we really hit it off, and texted each other for all of Friday night and Saturday and then worked together again later on in the day. On Saturday night we started talking about relationships and how she only wants to be in one with someone she feels really comfortable with (because her last b/f abused her). I asked her if she felt this way about me and she said yes so I asked her to a movie and she said yes.

at the time I thought she was 17, but it turns out that she is only 16. My question is do you guys think that the age gap here is to big and should I have entered this relationship after only knowing her for 48 hours??

P.S- since then we have seen a movie and basically been texting/calling each other all day everyday. I think I want to be with her but I have this feeling that its not going to work out because of age (along with what others may think) and because of work as well.

thanks for reading =)

Well, if you are 19, and she is 16, then it's not going to work because you can get into A lot of trouble. Like legal trouble. Don't risk that. It's not worth it.

On the other hand, there is no law that says that you guys can't be friends. She says that she's comfortable with you. So, be a friend.

Exactly... the Law is not on your side here.

Don't go and assume this is a full blown relationship right off the bat. Take some time, be a friend. Build the friendship first, it's still early.

Seeing as though I don't live in the states and this sort of thing isn't blown out of proportion in that way - pretending the law didn't exist, it's still not worth it..
People change a lot between 16 and 19.. You might find her cute,innocent, e.t.c... But at 16 she's still a baby man.. She's a little girl basically..
I know because I was in a similar spot when I was 18, and the girl was 15-16.. We hung out a lot and I constantly thought about it, but then I found that she was just too immature yet.. (which is normal)..
So legally and what I just said , it's a no-no both ways. Wait a couple of years

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Originally Posted by nickshehe

People change alot between 16 and 19..

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Good insight.

If you were to start dating her, what happens when your 22 and she is 19 and wants to party? You need to think ahead about these things.

There are many factors to consider here, the first one obviously being the law. It sounds like even though you have not known each other for very long, you still feel like you trust each other etc. However, when you both get a bit older, its going to get to the stage where she is going to want to go out and party, when you may want to settle down and be in a long-term relationship, and this is where it may cause problems.

For the time being, I would say be friends, get to know each other better, and just play it by ear. In the future, you may feel like you could make it work and have something really special.

VERY RED FLAGS

1) She is in high school still and is nowhere ready for a grown up relationship.
2) You could end up in jail as a sex offender.
3) She works with you and you could end up fired if she or you have an blow at work.
4) A relationship within 48 hours? You have got to be kidding with that high school stuff.
5) Where does a 19 year old take a 16 year old on a date?
6) What do you think her parents will say? Aren't you afraid they may call a cop, or shove a shotgun up your a$$ for messing with there baby?
7) The fact that you are falling so fast for a kid without thinking of all the consequences, doesn't say much for your own maturity, or decision making.
8)This is a really bad idea. Get someone your own age and leave the jail bait alone.

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Originally Posted by talaniman

VERY RED FLAGS

1) She is in high school still and is nowhere ready for a grown up relationship.
2) You could end up in jail as a sex offender.
3) She works with you and you could end up fired if she or you have an blow at work.
4) A relationship within 48 hours? You have got to be kidding with that high school stuff.
5) Where does a 19 year old take a 16 year old on a date?
6) What do you think her parents will say? Aren't you afraid they may call a cop, or shove a shotgun up your a$$ for messing with there baby?
7) The fact that you are falling so fast for a kid without thinking of all the consequences, doesn't say much for your own maturity, or decision making.
8)This is a really bad idea. Get someone your own age and leave the jail bait alone.

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Here's the thing... I am 19 and have had only had 1 girlfriend and of that have never had sex. We are both basically on the same level dating and sex wise because we are both virgins so I feel more comfortable rather than dating someone my age who is of course not a virgin. . She is telling her parents today and she thinks that they should be fine with it because when she was a freshmen she was dating a senior in h.s so they have been through it before.

I find myself mature in general but haven't had a g/f in over a year and was getting desperate. She is much more mature for her age but I'm having second thoughts about this whole thing as well. Anybody else got some advice?

Edit: thanks for the advice so far guys but would anybody advise for like a summer fling or something? I'm going off to college in the fall and she will still be in h.s.

Dude don't do it. If you have a summer fling and she really falls for you and then you say well it's been great going off to college now have a good year, you will destroy her. And what's the saying hell has no furor like a woman scorned. She could have you arrested (if you had sex). Best to just stay work friends.

Stay friends for now and when she is legally an adult then you can get serious

OK well she has told me that I have made her ready for a relationship again and she really likes me... how do I let her down while staying friends?

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edit: thanks for the advice so far guys but would anybody advise for like a summer fling or something? I'm going off to college in the fall and she will still be in h.s.

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FORGET IT, what your asking is for advice to get over on a kid. No wonder you can't find a g/f, that's creepy.

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o NitSuA o, OK well she has told me that I have made her ready for a relationship again and she really likes me...

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If your as honest as you are horny, you'll let her down easy.

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how do I let her down while staying friends?

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Being nice and being firm, and hope you do it right, and stay out of jail. Keep it real dude, you think she is easy, and that's all you care about. Easy pickings.

I want to point something out here. Actually two things. IF her parents were to be okay with this and you two start to date and have sex and you get on her parent's bad side they can just call the cops and get you thrown in jail for Statutory rape. When you get out, you have to register as a sex offender. That means that no matter where you live you have to register and everyone in your neighbor will have access to the knowledge that you are a sex offender, and not necessarily know why. And you know people always assume the worst.

It's just a bad idea. Be friends. She has a lot of growing up to do that you may have already done. Just because you are both virgins does NOT mean that you are both in the same level of dating. You are probably more mature than her. Someone that is a freshman in high school does not have the same grasp on romance than someone that is about to be a freshman in college.

It really is a huge difference. I'm 22, and the thought of dating someone that is 19 is creepy because of the huge maturation period in those three years. NO offense..

What's up with these guys willing to take a penitentiary chance, just to get some young nookie??

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Originally Posted by talaniman

Whats up with these guys willing to take a penitentiary chance, just to get some young nookie????????????

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Beats me. Last thing I want to do is end up with a kid...

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Originally Posted by o NitSuA o

ok well she has told me that i have made her ready for a relationship again and she really likes me... how do i let her down while staying friends?

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I would tell her the truth. But beyond that, how did she go from being a girl you didn't know to your girlfriend within 3 days. Even at legal age you are rushing to fast.

I'm going to her house tomorrow and we are going to talk about this whole thing. Its not that I am horny, I would just like a "companion". I feel that we did rush into things and I am going to tell her this tomorrow. I think she is cool but I think I need to find someone older.

How about this? I tell her that we shouldn't be dating at the moment, but we should get to know each other more and if we feel like we should take it to the next step then go ahead with it.

By the way her parents are cool with the relationship as are mine (I asked my dad for advice as well)

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Originally Posted by o NitSuA o

im going to her house tomorrow and we are gonna talk about this whole thing. its not that i am horny, i would just like a "companion". i feel that we did rush into things and i am going to tell her this tomorrow. I think she is cool but i think i need to find someone older.

how about this? I tell her that we shouldn't be dating at the moment, but we should get to know each other more and if we feel like we should take it to the next step then go ahead with it.

btw her parents are cool with the relationship as are mine (i asked my dad for advice as well)

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I think you guys should just remain friends. Period. As I stated before, her parents being fine with it NOW could backfire later. I honestly would just tell her she is a great friend and you want to keep it that way, and find a romantic interest that is more your age.

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Originally Posted by o NitSuA o

i find myself mature in general but havent had a g/f in over a year and was getting desperate.

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I think what you say here about you getting desperate is quite significant.