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-   -   I'm falling for my boyfriends best friend! (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=217309)

  • May 18, 2008, 06:26 PM
    kat_140890
    I'm falling for my boyfriends best friend!
    I've been with my boyfriend for about 7 months now and we're co close and I love him dearly. We fight quite a bit but nothing major. But I've known one of his best friends for a about 10 years now and I met my boyfriend through him. I've always liked his best friend and now I see him a lot as me and my boyfriend go out with him and others every weekend. But now I'm panicking because I've always fancied my bfs friend and I had a dream about him a little while ago and can't stop thinking about it. I felt so happy in the dream. Me and my boyfriend are quite different and have elived very different lives. And then I see his best friend and I've known him for so long, and we've had a very similar upbringing. Even our mums are really good friends. Its just getting difficult now because it makes me doubt my feelings for my boyfriend when we are with his best mate. But then when we are alone I don't want anyone else. His friend and I have flirted in the past but nothings ever happened. I don't no what to do. I keep thinking that me and his friend would match so perfectly. Its all so confusing :S:S:S:S xxx
  • May 19, 2008, 04:51 AM
    nova225
    I think that you would be disrespecting your boyfriend, and yourself. Dating, liking, or even wanting to be with your BFs best friend is something a young naïve kid do. Even if the feelings were mutual, how could two people that are very close to him do something like that. If you got together with this other guy; you would ruin a good friendship, and you and this guy might not stay together forever... where does that leave you?? They might reconcile, and you might be the one who's being talked about by every guy, and girl you know (trust me it happens). If you're so unhappy with you BF, let him go because he doesn't deserve someone who's willing to breakup with him for his best friend.

    I hope everything works out. :)
  • May 19, 2008, 09:56 AM
    JBeaucaire
    I disagree slightly. It's not disrespectful to date anyone, regardless of the feelings of 3rd parties. People who forward the idea that youo shouldn't date someone because it hurts their feelings are being selfish. You have to decide if you care to entertain that sort of unhealthy friendships.

    At 7 months you're at the stage where you should be making some serious decisions about keeping exclusive to your guy, or not. So from my point of view, you're doing exactly that.

    Anyway. You will always be attracted to other guys, your entire life that will happen. While dating, you get to decide if you want to switch guys. Once you get married, your SUPPOSED to stop allowing those thoughts. So enjoy your freedom as a single person and switch off.

    I detect your commitment to your guy is waning, why not try your hand at someone you like more anyway? It's not a sin, as long as you're not deceitful about it.
  • May 19, 2008, 03:50 PM
    nova225
    I agree that she should enjoy her life, and go out with anyone she pleases but it's her BF best friend for god sakes. It's not like she has feelings for her BFs brother, but some guys feel like their best friend is somewhat like their brother (especially if they're closer than close).

    That's why some girls get talked about like a dog, because they do cutt throat things like this. If you feel like you and this guy are meant to be because of the same “upbringing“... GO FOR IT.
  • Sep 6, 2010, 04:07 PM
    gghghg
    I've got the same prob... I love my boyfriend but I'm falling forhis best friend, and his best friend really likes me also... its all so confusing... I feel like I love them both.. and I was daydreaming a minute ago and thought about something and in my daydream.. my bf's best friend was my boyfriend. And yesterday my bf's best friend's sister and I r bffs and she was eavesdroping on his convolast night and he said whenmy boyfriend breaks up with me, he's coming after me. And that I was the prettest girl.
    I'm so confused, so I no how you feel.
  • Sep 6, 2010, 04:21 PM
    Cat1864
    gghghg, if you would like advice your problem, please ask your question in another thread where we wouldn't be taking over someone else's thread.

    Thank you.
  • Sep 6, 2010, 05:28 PM
    Fr_Chuck

    Closed,

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