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-   -   Was truthful with boyfriend but he can't handle it! (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=213326)

  • May 6, 2008, 07:30 PM
    alwaystrue
    Was truthful with boyfriend but he cant handle it!
    I been together with my boyfriend for 1 year. We talk about anything and I have never lied and neither has he. Not only is he my man but best friend as well that I love and would like to spend my life with and we have talk about marriage.

    Recently I told him about something I have done in my past, that he really figure out but I confirm, that I had slept with my best friend twice, who happens to be female. I don't know how he figure it out but he did. I always wanted to tell him but my friend told me not to because he might always try to compare himself and feel less like a man so I took her advice because she older than me, I 27 and she's 34.

    I never lied to him and this is the only thing I did not share. Was I wrong? I found now every time I with her or spend the night at her house he assume when are doing something, but where not. I tell him it happen in the past before we starting dating and sometimes he tried to make me compare. Now with the friend I not sure about anymore because she is jealous of my boyfriend. Not that she wants him, because she wants me. I always tell her I just want to be friends with her and nothing more. We never talked about what happen between us even though she tried to at times and I told her it makes me feel uncomfortable, then she drops it, otherwise our friendship is great.

    I just want some advise on how to ease the mind of my boyfriend that I don't like girls?
  • May 6, 2008, 08:16 PM
    Fr_Chuck
    If you are still friends with this girl, I can see where your boyfriend is having a problem, it is the same as he being good friends with his last girlfriend he sleep with. And what if your boyfriend was sleeping over at his last girlfriends home?



    Now next you never ever compare, that will only end in heartaches,
    I believe in honesty if there is a need to be completely honest, but there does not ever need to be details

    Advice, don't get into specific details of past sexual experiences, the past needs to stay in the past. And don't be close friends and spend nights with people you have sleep with, if you don't want your new boyfriend to be jealous.
  • May 7, 2008, 04:14 AM
    liz28
    If this friend of your has feeling for you than maybe you should limited your time with her because it a threat to your relationship and its troubling your boyfriend. It had to be something there for him to figure it out in the first place.
  • May 7, 2008, 09:38 PM
    talaniman
    Quote:

    I just want some advise on how to ease the mind of my boyfriend that I don't like girls?
    Not being with an ex lover would be a good start. What do you expect a guy to do, when your astill spending time with an ex? You may be doing nothing at all, but it sure will look suspicious at best.
  • May 8, 2008, 04:24 AM
    alwaystrue
    I would like to clear some things up. She is not my ex because I was never in a relationship with her, she's one of my closest friend who I sexual relations with twice a little bit over 2 years ago.

    We never discuss what happen between us even she have tried but I feel uncomfortable talking about.

    Since I started dating my boyfriend time with her I spend is limited because I always with my boyfriend and I mostly talk with her over the phone. I spent the night at her house once since being with him because she tried to do something again and I did not like her and I told her so.

    My friendship with her is now on the rocks because I believe she is jealous because of how he treats me and her man don't treat her good at all and I realize that now a I keep her out me and my boyfriend business by not telling her what goes on between me and him.

    As for my boyfriend he seems okay and just want to make should it don't happen again because he don't want to compete with a girl and he realize it happen in the past way before him. I like the first person advice because I understand what you meanth and point got across so thanks.

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