My S.O. has had full custody of both of is children for over a year now. His ex has not seen the children for 10 months now and she is supposed to see them every other Saturday for 10 hours unsupervised. She is also supposed to pay child support, which she has been doing off and on. All of this is court ordered. She calls at odd times, sometimes 6-10 weeks apart, and since she had her new baby, we haven't heard from her. I've looked online for abandonment laws in Oregon, but I cannot get a direct simple answer. Does anybody know? We spent a lot of time and money on getting full custody of both children, and we would like to know if we can have her rights terminated since she has failed to follow through with most of the court orders. She lives about 1 hour away from us, has all our phone #'s, our address, but she can't come see the children, even when she comes to town to go to the casino. If anyone can give me a bit of info on which direction take, I would appreciate it. OH! I did find this...

Oregon Statutes Search Oregon Statutes


419B.506 - Termination upon finding of neglect
The rights of the parent or parents may be terminated as provided in ORS 419B.500 if the court finds that the parent or parents have failed or neglected without reasonable and lawful cause to provide for the basic physical and psychological needs of the child or ward for six months prior to the filing of a petition. In determining such failure or neglect, the court shall disregard any incidental or minimal expressions of concern or support and shall consider but is not limited to one or more of the following:

(1) Failure to provide care or pay a reasonable portion of substitute physical care and maintenance if custody is lodged with others.

(2) Failure to maintain regular visitation or other contact with the child or ward that was designed and implemented in a plan to reunite the child or ward with the parent.

(3) Failure to contact or communicate with the child or ward or with the custodian of the child or ward. In making this determination, the court may disregard incidental visitations, communications or contributions.

[1993 c.33 §141; 1997 c.873 §8; 2003 c.396 §86]

Are you considering adopting the children?

If so, ask her if she'll voluntarily terminate. If she won't, you may be able to play the money card, that once you adopt she won't be responsible for child support.

Frankly, I'd talk to a lawyer about it. It's actually pretty hard to get someone's parental rights severed involuntarily unless there is evidence of abuse.

My BF & I have talked about marriage, and adoption. I would adopt his 2 and he would adopt my 2, or however it works in the state of Oregon. The children's mother was found unfit, through a custody evaluation, because of drug use and poor judgement when it came to the children. She isn't around to abuse them, but she has essentially neglected/abandoned them. The youngest is a 5 y/old little girl, and she still can't understand why her mommy doesn't come see her. ( Her father and I have been together since she was 3. She will be 6 in DEC. ) It has caused serious emotional issues with her, nad her 9 y/ old brother seems to be coping just fine. He is concerned for the new baby his mother just had, because he doesn't want her to leave that baby like she did them.

I would call your countys courthouse and ask for an appointment with the family law facilitator. They can usually answer more in depth questions than by just calling by phone and can also point you in the right direction for resources to help you.
My experience is if they are making some kind of contact and/or paying support it will be tough to terminate her rights involuntarily. I agree you should take the route of telling her if she terminates her rights legally then the child support stops. It could be incentive for her.

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