Hi guys. Long story short, my girlfriend of 8.5yrs and I broke up about 7months ago. Good relationship (not perfect, but good), but she wasn't sure if her and I felt "right", whatever that means. She basically wants to be on her own for a little while. But anyway, I was DEVASTATED to say the least. Went into NC (mostly) through about February when we started talking about the pending sale of our house we owned together. Those conversations basically put us on a more friendly level. Anyway, one thing led to another and we ended up hooking up a couple of times. Basically, she told me that she was still in love with me, misses me, blah blah (her always in tears)... but just doesn't want to be in a relationship right now. She says she needs this "time". Well, during one of those times of getting together, we made plans to go to this concert on Monday. Since then, we've closed on the house and I have kind of gone into NC again (since there is no excuse for us to talk about the house anymore and she has no plans on getting back together). Well, she emailed me last night asking about the concert and I didn't know what to do. On the one hand, it would be a really nice time and a nice evening spent together (and maybe cause her doubts about whether she did the right thing or not grow). But on the other, I know it's best to just leave her alone and not have anything to do with her for a while. My brain knows what to do, but my heart wants to do another! I ended up emailing her today basically telling her that we weren't going to go together. She responded with a simple "ok" and an unhappy face. My question is, am I doing the right thing? I want to go with her, but I know I shouldn't! I know this sounds so stupid compared with what others are going through. But believe me, I went through the BS. This girl put my whole world upside down (after 8.5yrs). Just want some feedback because a big part of me wants to call her tonight or tomorrow and tell her to "let's go and have a good time!" Thanks guys.

Basically I think if you would not be able to go to the concert without hurting more that you are broke up it probably is better you do not go. Save yourself the pain of going and being hurt more.

Sorry dude, false hope is running your life. Let her go and stay in NC for your own well being. In time maybe you can be friends when you have both moved on but for now its best to leave the past in the past.

I think like you said.. You've already been through the BS.. 8.5 years is a long time.. I'm sure you've been through a lot of heartache on her account.. You know what the best thing for you to do is - what you need to decide is whether you want to be the nice guy or if your well-being is more important.

You already know to make a clean as a break as possible. Give her the break she ask for. Forget the false hope and a friendship stuff until you have healed. I would disappear from her life.