I haven't posted on here in a couple of months.. but I will try to make this note short... my commonlaw spouse, Mike, left me and his 2 kids, 2 days before xmas, 2007... in a dear john email. For nearly 4 months, I tried and tried to speak with him about our problems, and he would have nothing to do with it. I've since learnt that he may have cheated on me during our relationship, and that just before he left me, he was going to a bar to see a particular woman, nothing happened until we split...
Now 4 months after the fact, he decides that he thinks we should talk, so I went over to his place, and he asked if I thought we could make it, and I said yes, but that we needed to do things differently. That night he told me that he did love me, and he missed me. We've been together ever since. Last Friday, he suggested he give his landlord his notice, and move back in. I told him I'd been thinking about it and wasn't avoiding the question. So yesterday, he said that maybe we should spend the one night apart so that I could think. I replied to him, I don't want to think, we need to discuss what it is we want for our future and see if we are on the same page. If I get back with him, I want to do it with my eyes wide open this time. But a little part of me thinks he's only doing this, cause he doesn't want to go to court, and pay for support. He didn't even give me my support for April yet,(400.00) and once we go to court he'll have to give me a little more than that according to his wages. It's just something he said in an email to me, that makes me think that, cause he has paperwork to fill out for the court on the 6th of may, and he said he was hoping we didn't have to go that route. But since he left, I was forced to go on social assistance, due to a medical leave from my work, and I have to take him to court, regardless if I want to or not. I am returning to work next week. Anybody have any suggestions. Could really use some help, I'm so torn between what I should do...

I would not be so quick to have him move in with you and kids due to his last departure.You have to think about he left you and kids, and think if you really want to put yourself and kids through it because history have a way of repeating itself. Also, you should follow your instincts because it will never steer you wrong!

Questions, does he even bring up to you about child support because some guys guys believe in the cheeper to keep her theory. But if you receives social services they will make him pay and give you none whether you together or not.

Wish you luck!

I think you know the answer to this question, I really know that you have the gut feeling. Follow it, because I find it strange that after four months he does the jack in the box, and has not given you the support for April, unfortanetly his love is not going to pay the support, and just because he thinks he can just pop back into your life he doesn't have to pay, Honey listen if he wants to support his children and isn't selfish he would do it, he didn't care that you had to go and get assistance where was he? He made his own bed, and don't make it easy for him and more difficult for you, so don't let him confuse you. I think you know what you have to do, go with your heart. If he really wants you no matter what the outcome is with courts he would just be with you... Don't rush into moving him in just yet.

For now, while things are worked out, put the interest of you, and the kids, first, and HE can think about what HE wants. Once bitten..! You know what he is capable of, so protect you and yours.