Ask Me Help Desk

Ask Me Help Desk (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/forum.php)
-   Relationships (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/forumdisplay.php?f=277)
-   -   Over the summer (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=209796)

  • Apr 26, 2008, 11:15 AM
    jordangee2
    Over the summer
    Ok so yesterday I found out that my girlfriend want to take a break do to her moving back home because of school being out. She said she still wants to be friends and when she comes back for school she wants to just pick up where we left off. She says she needs her space and some time to think too. I am doing my best to give her that. She says that we can still hang out over the summer and still be like in an open relationship she is just scared of the distance. I opened my mouth a little soon dropping the I love you line and I think I scared her and she said I kind of have been smothering here and she said she just needed her space and wanted to build our friend relationship over the summer and when she moves back she wants to pick up where we left off. So what do I do cause I really like this girl and want to be with her? Thanks for the help Jordan
  • Apr 26, 2008, 01:24 PM
    strong__dan
    Well if I were you I would give her, her space for the summer, then when school starts again talk to her and see if its worth it getting back together! But when she says she wants a break and then get back together and an open relationship, what does that mean, does she want to hook up with other guys and stuff!
  • Apr 26, 2008, 02:49 PM
    chuff
    Give her the space she asks for. Then allow her to come back to you when YOU are ready. The key is, you have to NOT be ready when she returns. She caused the break so when and if she returns you need to have her come after you. If you go right back to her she's going to know that you'll always be available and she can play the "let's take a break" game at any time with you.
  • Apr 26, 2008, 06:19 PM
    nickshehe
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by jordangee2
    She said she still wants to be friends and when she comes back for school she wants to just pick up where we left off.

    -So she wants to fool around guilt-free and if she decides she still wants to be in a relationship with you after she's done seeing what possibilities there are for her out there,then you'll pick up where you left off... Sorry to be so raw but that doesn't sound like too good of a deal. What she is telling you is she wants you to be her doormat so she walks all over you..

    Quote:

    Originally Posted by jordange2
    She says that we can still hang out over the summer and still be like in an open relationship she is just scared of the distance.

    If its possible for the two of you to hang out as she's saying.. I don't see why distance is an issue for her?

    The ugly part is, there isn't much you can do I'm afraid.. You can't pressure her or smother her in love... all you can do is wait.. The CORRECT thing to do(my humble opinion always-might get people disagreeing)would be NC.. with low expectations..
    I'm sorry but I don't think she's coming back any time soon.. and if you two do get back - it's only because she hasn't found someone yet...

    The term OPEN relationship for someone(you) who claims you love her - usually ends up with you being the victim and eventually heart broken.
    Like tal says, I'm sorry for your loss.. I really am :/
    Good luck though ,ill keep my fingers crossed for you buddy.

  • All times are GMT -7. The time now is 09:44 AM.