Ask Me Help Desk - Martin died feb 23 I died feb 23

My soulmate my life my smile was taken from me feb 23 after 3 weeks in intensive care . He waited for me I got goodbye but it doesn't make it easier. He was 45 he would have been 46 4 days after he died . People say times a healer but at the moment I find every day gets harder and lonlier still think he's key will go in the door then it gets real again I cry constantly my eyes are dead don't know how I still function I'm 35 and can't see any recovery I seen so much trauma and grief in intensive care I get images when I close my eyes . I got a son who's 4 and only just started talking about martin and 2 daughters aged 11 and 18 . I look at couples and think why my martin why never knew grief I do now wouldn't wish these shoes on anyone xheartbroken x

Im so sorry for your broken heart, I can't imagine how horrible it must be.. Maybe take some solice in the fact that Martin is in a WAYY better place now then he ever was here. He's in no more pain

I only have my son as my only living relative as everyone else is gone. It's hard losing someone but you must remember that you come here when it's your time and you leave here when it's your time to go. Martin is still with you in your heart and thoughts. My husband has come back to me after being gone since July 2002. He's now a prankster ghost who likes to take things from me or my son and literally disappear the items for up to 2 weeks at a time. He's still with me - I just can't hug him that's all. I know he follows me to work and rides with me in my car and looks over me and my son. I have read many things about the next dimension (death) and basically it is supposed to be about 3 feet off the ground here on earth (of all places). Please dry your eyes and remember that your beloved Martin is still with you. Remember the movie ghost with Patrick Swazie? It's almost like that in real life.

Thank you twink for a lovely reply I also am in to after death amongst other things I have received about 20 white feathers since martin died , but that hug would be fantastic if only x

My husband has left strange things for my son and me. We find quarters neatly piled beside table legs. We find screws on the floor. We find bubble gum on his workbench that was taken from a bag I was taking to work. My son had his favorite pocket screwdriver missing for about 2 weeks only to discover it back in the house on the floor of the dog's room. We found out later that this same screwdriver showed up on a deceased friend of my son's cargo vessel being used by a crewman. He said it appeared near the area he was going to try and repair. The screwdriver was a little bit bent but otherwise OK. We figured out that his friend and his father got together in the next world and were having a good time together. His girlfriend in another country had a few items of hers disappear and then be returned. She also knew his friend and she looked like his original girlfriend who died when she was about 19. Apparently we figured out that she was reincarnated from this lady and he is "watching" over her very carefully. My son and her get along fantastically and this man obviously approves from the other side! Long story. Yes, my dear, your Martin is watching over you as your bond is very strong. Apparently you two must have been together in many lifetimes before. You will be with him again probably in another few more lifetimes. In this realm you tend to meet the same people over and over again that you knew in other lifetimes. I am totally convinced of this in many instances just in my own lifetime. I am so glad that you are feeling better having the white feathers come to you. Martin is a very strong person and strong spirit as he can do this so soon after his death. Apparently he will be around you for years to come.

Hi
I also lost my husband and I want to share with you, Greg died on October 31 2008,this past I flew him home to pass with myself and our children . We had been together for 26 years and I love him with all of my heart.He came to me with in five hours and he said to me, out loud ( I love you ) the next night he called my name twice. He has re dailed phone numbers and he has kept 7 pink ballons a floating in our bed room that were filled in the first week of October,it is December 21. I find dimes every where,( he had told me that I was a dime piece) I stiil cry a lot myself and I find all of these ( blessings) that I am being giving, and I hope that they never end. I too am in love and I am so lonely, just to smell him I have kept his Hoodie with his smell on it and I talk to him .I am lost but I am finding comfort in many things that are going on here in our home. I know that he loved me and our children.And he would have never left had the cancer not taken him. I am so sorry for your loss and I pray that you will receiev the one thing that will help you start to heal.Yes it hurts and it is hard But he wants you to be happy and he is sending you a message.I have been cryen and had to stop, because my husbands spirit has done things that made my mouth drop and fall open, and before I knew it ,I was smiling inside myself and laughing out load. That is a real good feeling I pray that you will find some peace in knowing also that you are not alone I am only 48 I not young,but I am at heart and I have my family but the man that I loved is gone eight weeks now and he has me smiling again,and cryen less. Love life a little more because of him. Lady Lori

I know it's hard now but you have to keep going. If not for you then for your children. My father passed away when I was 4. It killed my mother also. She never recovered from the grief. She stopped caring about herself and to some extent me and my 3 sisters.When he passed she lost her soulmate. I know she loved us but she just wasn't fully with us anymore. Eventually the grief took such a toll on her that she passed away from something that was totally preventable if she had cared enough. Your children just lost their father, don't let them lose you as well. They need you.

I am also a widow - unlike other people (and I wish it WOULD happen), I've received no signs, no contact, nothing from my husband - nor did I expect to. But he really is always with me.

I can only tell you my experience - I look back now and I cannot clearly remember the first 6 months after he died. I'm sure various holidays came and went but I don't clearly recall them. There were days when I didn't know how I was going to go on. There were nights when I sat at the kitchen table and drank coffee until daylights. There were days when I never got dressed. I went back to work after 3 months and I'm sure I wasn't up to par.

Everyone told me that I would get angry with him for leaving me. So far that has not happened. I have started to date, which is very difficult, but my life has gone on. We had the "benefit" (if that's the word) of a long illness and so my husband and I talked about every issue there was. We always knew I would be a widow and he did his very best to put my feet on the path to healing from losing him. He also said over and over that I did him no honor if I threw myself in the grave with him (so to speak). I've tried to remember that.

When I passed the 13 month mark things got easier - it never completely goes away but I see a light at the end of the tunnel.

It isn't fair. None of what happened to you is fair. You have children and I'm sure you know you have to be strong for them - but I'm sure that's not a big help to you. I got sick and tired of people telling what I "had" to do.

Grief takes all forms, takes different periods. People process grief in various ways.

I'm so sorry for your loss - I honestly am.

Quote:

Originally Posted by nitrammi

my soulmate my life my smile was taken from me feb 23 after 3 weeks in intensive care . he waited for me i got goodbye but it dosent make it easier. he was 45 he would have been 46 4 days after he died . people say times a healer but at the moment i find every day gets harder and lonlier still think hes key will go in the door then it gets real again i cry constantly my eyes are dead dont know how i still function i,m 35 and can't see any recovery i seen so much trauma and grief in intensive care i get images when i close my eyes . i got a son whos 4 and only just started talking about martin and 2 daughters aged 11 and 18 . i look at couples and think why my martin why never knew grief i do now wouldnt wish these shoes on anyone xheartbroken x

There is nothing that anyone can say right now to make you feel better,so I'm sending you a lot of hugs and kisses,and wish could deliver them in person to you.

Stay strong please. Love Christina x x x x x x x

Quote:

Originally Posted by twinkiedooter

My husband has left strange things for my son and me. We find quarters neatly piled beside table legs. We find screws on the floor. We find bubble gum on his workbench that was taken from a bag I was taking to work. My son had his favorite pocket screwdriver missing for about 2 weeks only to discover it back in the house on the floor of the dog's room. We found out later that this same screwdriver showed up on a deceased friend of my son's cargo vessel being used by a crewman. He said it appeared near the area he was going to try and repair. The screwdriver was a little bit bent but otherwise ok. We figured out that his friend and his father got together in the next world and were having a good time together. His girlfriend in another country had a few items of hers disappear and then be returned. She also knew his friend and she looked like his original girlfriend who died when she was about 19. Apparently we figured out that she was reincarnated from this lady and he is "watching" over her very carefully. My son and her get along fantastically and this man obviously approves from the other side! Long story. Yes, my dear, your Martin is watching over you as your bond is very strong. Apparently you two must have been together in many lifetimes before. You will be with him again probably in another few more lifetimes. In this realm you tend to meet the same people over and over again that you knew in other lifetimes. I am totally convinced of this in many instances just in my own lifetime. I am so glad that you are feeling better having the white feathers come to you. Martin is a very strong person and strong spirit as he can do this so soon after his death. Apparently he will be around you for years to come.

When my son died,something very strange happened to me. In our garden we have a fence,and one day,I looked out of the window,and saw the whitest most beautiful cat,sitting on it,he sat there and just watched me. Everyday I would go to check if the cat was there,he was,he would sit and watch me with the most beautiful eyes I've ever seen,he was a very fluffy cat,really magnificent. One night I decided,I would go out and stroke him when I next saw him. Next day I went to my place at the window,and the cat wasn't there,next day again not there,I never saw that cat again,he appeared for about 2 weeks and then was gone,I asked all my neighbours who did this beautiful cat belong too,no one had ever seen it. May be this was a message from somewhere,I've never forgot that beautiful creature,never will.

The wife of a friend of mine died in the Winter. She collected 4 leaf clovers. The day after the burial he was standing on his deck, looked down and there, pushing through the snow, was a 4 leaf clover.

Amazing, impossible - but he still has it.

So who's to say?

I read this years after your post and wonder how you are doing? I just a month ago yesterday lost my soul mate, my smile and joy,, suddenly,, still don't know how the autopsy won't be in for some time,,
Am devastated. Life and colors are dull and I too wonder why I am left here without him,,
Am I cursed or makingup for bad karma from a past life?
Just cannot understand...