Hi everyone,

My boyfriend (I have been with him about 6 months) is having his sister and his exgirlfriend (of 3 years) to visit. His sister and his ex are fairly good friends.

I will not be there. I am not worried that they will sleep together or anything, it just annoys me because I am convinced she is sniffing around. She seems incapable of letting him go and it irritates me. My boyfriend thinks I am mental because I constantly have problems with their friendship. In reality, I don't mind them being friends (lunch every so often, a drink here and there, christmas cards etc, meeting up if they are in the same city - completely fine). But making a special visit across the country and sleeping on his couch, with his sister? It seems a bit much to me,

Id be grateful for your responses... anything as this is driving me nuts! I want to explain to him how insensitive he is being, but he just says it is a problem with my self-confidence.

Smiley faces

How long has it been since they had broken up? Was it on good or bad terms?

Quote:

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it just annoys me because I am convinced she is sniffing around.

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You either trust him or you don't. I understand not trusting her, and that's the real issue. You haven't been with him long, so it may be hard, but it is his call.

The other issue is him dismissing your feelings by telling you that your instincts and doubts about the ex are all about your own lack of confidence. He either respects you and your feelings, cares that you are uneasy, and makes an honest effort to address the problem, or he doesn't. From what you've said, he's not. Does being told you are insecure make you feel more secure? In short, do his words make you feel better or worse?