My parents raised me to be the perfect gentleman (open doors, yes ma'am stuff, to wine and dine, how to cook, etc) but I can not seem to get the girl. I will be talking to them for a week or two, then they give me the cold shoulder and later tell me I am too nice. I have tried the jerk thing, but that only wears me out.
And another thing, I am going to put this in fishin terms, why do girls hook a guy, but never real him in. They would rather wait two weeks or so and jerk the line to make sure he is still on the hook. WHY? I would much rather play the game of keeping her on her toes while dating her, than play the game of cat and mouse.

You do not mention your age. So I will go out on a limb here. Girls your age are probably looking on the surface. I used to get that all the time too and it really hurts. But just wait, after they have been burned by the "jocks" and "punks" they will one day wake up and realize that Mr. Nice Guy is the best choice. Stick to your values. Losers will always be losers and looks will fade when their true nature comes out.

What's your number??
LOL Only joking... but it would be nice to meet a guy with some manners. Some guys these days are so immature, and girls eqaully so. Just think about the future, you sound like you're in high school so wait until your free from that place and you'll see that not all girls are as blind as those in high school. High school is kind of like a fake reality, half the people who think they're great will someday be the ones single and alone. Don't worry so much, one day you'll find a great girl who you can sweep off her feet.
Good luck with everything!

From experience, a girl can tell if a guy is a real gentleman or if he is “being” a gentleman as a means to an end.

I think it all comes down to sincerity. I know that I adore being treated like a lady… in whatever arena I am in, whether business suits and heels or jeans, tshirt, and a foam cheese head. When a man treats me like a lady, he commands my respect and my interest.

If you are being a gentleman out a sincere desire to treat a woman like a lady, than no, I don't think its possible to be “too nice.” If you are being a gentleman to get in her pants, then yes, there is such a thing as “too nice.”

You seem like the former rather than the latter.

Keep being that perfect gentleman, you'll find your princess. Don't stop looking! :)

No I am not in high school. I am actually a senior in college. And I am not looking to get in her pants, I am still a virgin. If I have gone this far, I might as well go till marriage.

There is always some one who is attracted to you, and likes who you are for yourself. Stand back, and look around a little closer. Its all in the ones you choose, and for nice guys that choice is limited by fear of rejection. Eliminate that fear, and your choices increase greatly.

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Originally Posted by the_gentleman

no I am not in high school. I am actually a senior in college. And I am not looking to get in her pants, I am still a virgin. If I have gone this far, I might as well go till marriage.

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Maybe your looking in all the wrong places.
Try looking at girls that share interests and hobbies with you or girls with your same major.
And there's nothing wrong with being a virgin... there are girls that like that too.

Don't give up!

My fiancée loves the fact I am a gentleman. I hold doors open for everyone. I say yes sir and yes ma'am. When I was younger I never really got to many girls because of the whole to nice thing. The girls I would get would try to get over on me cause I was such a nice guy. And I once I figured them out the nice guy left and the @$$hole I can be showed up. Then they wanted me. But it was to late for them then.

My finacee even admitted that if she would have started to date me before she turned 25 she would never had given me a second date because I am to nice. She says as she got older the guys who were jerks just wore her out.

Just remember this Girls want the @$$hole WOMEN want the gentleman.

I agree with all the posts to your question. Being nice is not bad thing and there's nothing wrong with it. Girls say that because they are not use to it and loves the jerkoffs and then try to change them into being nice, but soon realize they can't so they stay or eventually leave them later on.

You stay who you are and soon someone will love and cherish you especially if she is a real women.

In the meantime date a little and seek someone common with u. What soughts of girls you dated in the past? Oh, and always follow your intincts because there never wrong!!

Nice guys finished last in the battle but will win the war in the end...

Just be yourself, if you're a nice guy, be the best nice guy you can be.

I agree with Talaniman just be yourself. Treat a girl like a friend don't over do it and don't be the jerk. If a girl is into you she will appreciate you opening doors and all.
If she is not into you she will likely use that as the main part of why she didn't like you.
I know, I for one, do not like all the attention but I don't want to deal with a jerk either.
I like a guy I can just feel comfortable being me with.

I am not saying that I will go out of my way to open the door every time, specially if it makes the woman uncomfortable.

True...