When I was in 8th grade I realized I had feelings for one of my guy friends. Not a close friend but a simple crush nothing more. And he liked me too. But then this girl all of a sudden started crushing on him and then he liked her and then that was it they were going out and me and him were nothing. Now I am not all into feelings and I no one every really knows how I feel so I said whatever and that was it. We stayed friends and when him and her broke up me and him still talked of course. After 8th grade we both went to the same high school and stayed friends. Up until februray of our freshman year we were buds and then my mom and I got into a huge fight and she kicked me out so I had to move in with my dad in a new town and new school. It was horrible I felt dead inside. We got into the huge fight on a Thursday and my last day of school was a Monday so no one really knew I was leaving except for the kids in my classes and friends at lunch. I didn't have time to tell him I was leaving and then I got a missed call on my phone after school. It was from him saying" oh my god your moving?!? your'e Leaving?!?! How can I do this without you?!? Im going to miss you.." and so on. Its was heart breaking. We stayed in contact as much as we could. He called sometimes we would text it was like distant friends. I went to my old schools football games on Friday nights and he would be there and we would sit and be with each other until one of us has to leave. On St.Patricks day we went farther than kissing but no sex and he was the only guy I had ever done more than kissing. After St.Patricks day we didn't talk for a while until one night he called me saying hi. It was random but we talked for literally five minutes until his mom picked him up. Later that week he left me a message saying through everything we have been through he thinks he's in love with me. I felt the same. But I did'nt say it back I told him how sweet it was and we need to hang out more so we can be with each other. We hung out and madeout all summer long and led partly into out sophomore year and more football games and stuff.
Until recently we haven't talked then I found out he had a girlfriend. I texted him saying hi and he told me about her which is good because it shows he wasn't hiding her from me. I told him we should hang and he agreed. He later texted me asking if I was expecting anything and I said No I wasn't planning on anything and he said OK I told him we will just do what we do and replyed saying we couldn't do what we do meaning we won't be kissing or anything. He told me he is in love with this new girl hardcore. And we are friends, old friends. I feel broken and jealous and will do almost anything to have him. He is amazing and I hate his new girlfriend and I've never met her. She is so lucky and she doesn't even know it.
me and him are sophmores and known each other since 5th grade and she is a freakin freshman baby.
I'm so angry at the world and so lost without him.
what to do?
I want to break them up but I love him so much I would rather me be miserable and let him be happy with her then break them up and have him even be slightly sad.
:(
