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I am in love with a boy. Not just any boy, a boy that already has a girlfriend. That's not the only problem- "bob" and his girlfriend are completely in love. :( . He is amazingly witty and sweet. He actually helped me when my best guy friend asked me out and I had to turn him down very gently. "Bob" is everything I could ever ask for. I really need some suggestions on how to be there for him, yet not scare him off with my feelings! Thanks in advance...
Xoxo :rolleyes: xoxo
What you should do is not pursue him and leave him alone, and although I know it is hard because you have feelings for him, he has a girlfriend and his girlfriend will not only become angry at him if you and him become really close and such, but she will probably become angry at you and maybe even "come after you" so to speak. If you don't want a reputation as a girl who tries to get with boys who have girlfriends, which, I've known a few of in my day and trust me, no one thinks highly of them, you should really back off. =/
Sorry if that seems harsh, but I'm just trying to be honest.
On the forum here we are on the side of integrity and successful relationships. You won't get much advice on how to court someone else's b/f.
You want to be there for him? Tell him and his g/f that. At least that's honest. And you aren't risking losing anything, he's not yours to lose.
He has a Girlfriend so he is OFF LIMITS
Darlin, he's not available. He's not free. He's not even in the game...
Don't start down the road of trying to win other girls' boyfriends.
The perfect guy for you will be one who is free to woo you and capture your heart... not someone who is already taken. Hold out for him :)
Control yourself or remove yourself from the equation.
never take away someone's something/someone that has already have...
even if you like him that much or even in love with him?. just try to be there with him.. just be a friend... a good friend... ^^... if sometime along the road... he fell off the road with his girlfriend?. and don't get your hope on that or trying to break them up...
best wishes.. and don't do anything stupid..
If you think you can be his friend (and only that) then great, but if you want to be there for him because you think he'll fall in love with you, then leave him and his girlfriend alone. He's in love, but not with you, get over him and find someone that's available.
N0 he is everything his girlfriend ever asked for cause she got him!Quote:
Originally Posted by softbalgrl1331
You are in love with who he is... so you write down all the qualities you admire and love in him and look for your own guy that has similar qualities.
Just because your smitten, and have strong feelings for someone, doesn't mean they are available to you, no matter how strongly you wish otherwise. The mature and correct thing is to get your own perfect guy, and leave her's alone. He is out of bounds.
You guys are all right---> I'm going to just be friends with "bob" and try to find a special guy for just for me.. not try to take anyone else's away. Thanks for your help!
HI...Quote:
Originally Posted by softbalgrl1331
Well I know how you feel not so long ago I was in your shoes and its not a place place to be.
The advice I am going to give you is what I done OK so listen to it,but its down to you to take it... 1) Reasure him that any time he needs a friend to chat too you will be their... 2) Don't hate the girl who he is with as she has done nothing wrong.. 3)If u try to split them up it will back fire,if he loves this girl it could be the best thing that's happened to him,and it could spoil your freindship that's the last thing you want to happen.. 4)If they row don't take sides listen to them both... and in the end your the better person as you steped aside and let natuer take its course.. if they stay togethe it was meant to be.. if it don't then you shall have your answer !
Remember a boy that woul dump his current for you, is just as likely latter to dump you for that next girl. So you stay back and if they break up latter, then you can try, but sometimes it is just a matter of timming
I now the feeling I have a simialer problem. Just be there for him and maybe you should tell him how you feel if you really have strong feelings for him but do it in a good way so you don't lose himQuote:
Originally Posted by softbalgrl1331
I know how you feel. I was in really liked a girl for many years who always had a boyfriend who never treated her right but she liked him. I tried to intervine, but it only make her mad and not talk to me as much. Not saying to play games, but how much do you talk to him? Have you tried to be mysterious, you know, not talk to him for a month. And when you do, small talk and that's it. If he does like you deep down, he will start thinking about why you two don't talk anymore and he will pursue you.
But to finish my story, she got married and I moved on. Now that I look back I realize she wasn't that perfect. If anything, many flaws and we didn't have that much in common.
The OP is doing the right thing already, I think that further advice is not necessary, especially since some people are telling her to go get him, which is not good advice.Quote:
Originally Posted by softbalgrl1331
You can't just go for a guy who's already taken. How would you feel if a girl tried to get between you and your boyfriend's relationship? I know I would not like you very much. He's in love with someone already, and if you want him, he'll have to come to you, love is a two way street. My advice, leave this boy alone, don't create drama in his relationship. Look at the situation in his girlfriend's point of view, and just move on.
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