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-   -   Best Man being less than wonderful (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=201514)

  • Apr 2, 2008, 10:11 AM
    Shell_Lee
    Best Man being less than wonderful
    I'm getting married this Sat and my fiance's best man is being less than great.

    It seems as though he's more excited about getting the "old group" back together for a free day of drinking than he is about us getting married. On top of that, his ex (who both have very strong feelings for each other) is also standing up in the wedding. She lives half way across the country and is flying in today for the wedding. She is staying with the best man while here. I asked her if she would be able to go out with me and my man of honor on Friday night for a little while after the rehearsal dinner. This way she can just stay over as we have to get up early in the morning to get our hair done (esp. since she doesn't have a car here)

    Well the best man found out about and sent me a message asking me why I was "kidnapping" her for the night. That my day was Sat and not Fri night. I know that he was joking around in how he said it, but I know that he is upset that I'm "taking her away from him one night that she is here". He also mentioned something to my fiancé about how I was taking her on Fri night.

    What do you think I should do in this situation? I think he's being selfish, but I don't want to cause any waves this close to the wedding.

    Thanks

    Shell
  • Apr 2, 2008, 02:08 PM
    vividdaze12
    It is your day, your week your month. Any one who ever planned a wedding knows this. Let him deal with issues on his own time. She is there for you not this guy.
  • Apr 2, 2008, 03:06 PM
    kp2171
    He's being a snot.

    Its OK to be really excited about getting the gang together... he doesn't have the same buildup you do... he isn't getting married. Sure, he's excited hopefully for your pending union... but excitement about a night out celebrating is normal within reason. Try to let this pass.

    As for the ex you've asked to be with you... its your event, and asking her to be with you is not unreasonable. I understand his disappointment. If he persists being a jerk id tell him you understand he wants to see her, but that you need to get through the next couple of days and you need her support.

    Honestly, I didn't have a clue about what the ladies in the party go through the day of the wedding with nails and hair and makeup... no clue at all.

    So... do the best you can to relax, and if he persists ask your groom to step in for you and deflect the noise.

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