The closer Pete and I get the more I fall for him. I have wanted to say "I love you" to him for a couple of weeks now. It nearly came out last night but I stopped myself.

He has told me he misses me when I go home at night and I told him I felt the same, he has also told me I am the best thing that's ever happened to him. I always find my eyes welling up with tears at crucial moments because I am so happy.

It's something I want to say and somedays I feel I just want to burst and tell the whole world that I love him (sounds stupid, but that's how I feel) - but I can never quite bring myself to say it.

My friends say I need to wait for him to say it first; and I perhaps think it may be a little early in the relationship to be saying it (which may be why I am holding back) - but I just wondered what all of your thoughts may be on the subject? Pete and I have been together for over 4 months now.

Damn it, it's not a contest, there are no rules. Go ahead but pick your moment. Four months would be OK for me as a guy to hear or say that. For the record I said it first but I have quite a bit of self-confidence due to being a little older.

Hi,
In the last many years, I have known 3 or 4 couples who eventually didn't get married, simply because neither one wanted to say "I love you". It's true!
They went their separate ways, and never would have known if the other loved them or not. All the signs were there, but it never happened.
Four months isn't a very long time when compared to a lifetime. Give it some time. Some go together for a whole year before they realize they are in really in love.
There is nothing wrong with a woman telling a man she loves him. And, vice versa. I don't know of any cultural ideas about a man has to say it first. If you know you really love this man, just tell him. If he doesn't feel the same way, he will let you know. Hopefully, he will say the words right back to you!

Well what about valentines day? He told me last night that he has planned something, a surprise. So perhaps that may be the night, I can just pick the right moment then?

If you're both feeling all snuggly and stuff, sure.

Well we are snuggly and stuff the majority of the time we are together, when we stay inand we are equally affectionate with each other when we are out.

How long have you dated?

Is it lust and smitten?. these feelings go away.

I think the first 6 months to a year you SHOW them how you feel - don't say it.

You say those 3 little words and things can change fast - sometimes for the better and a LOT of times for the worse.

IT's NOT a game... but it's not something NOT to take lightly - believe me.

I have had women feel 100 times more pressure in the past when I said it. They eventually were gone.

My advice would be to wait - do nice things for him on occasion. Talk. Be there - hang out. He'll know.

I don't see what the big deal is... if you love him, tell him. It's that simple. Ima guy so I may have different thoughts about this... but the first time you say "I love you" isn't a day you mark on your calendar, is it?

I wouldn't advise waiting for him to say it... seems to me that men will be more relucant than women to say the first "I love you."

If the FIRST time isn't as important to you than just the freedom to be able to say it when you feel it, just slip one in there sometime when he does something nice for you. If you say it and mean it in a "perfectly natural, normal" way (hehe... The dad from the American Pie movies... best dad on earth lol) then Im sure he will just go with the flow.

DJH from what your posting it sounds like this guy means a lot to you. I see nothing wrong with you telling him that you LOVE HIM, it makes no diffrence if you say it first our he does.

And no your not stupid your just happy in love, don't keep those feelings all bottled up, let them out I'm sure from the way you say your both so close he won't be shocked.

Do you txt one another often? If so why not try and drop it out in the end of a txt "I LOV U" ! Ok its not face to face or personal but you will get a feeling of what he txt's you back. That just one idear any way... Hope all goes well for you both.

Maybe Valentines Day is that special day? Do not rush it. Let it be natural. If it is the right time you will know. Or if its not. You both show each other how much you care for each other. Everything else will come. Enjoy Valentines Day with your Hunny. Early Happy Valentines day!

Joe

Let me see if you wait for a guy to say it, perhaps two years this fourth of July. If you don't fell free to talk to this perosn about any and everything, you don't really love him yet, if you are scared or worried about saying it, you don't have it.

Opinion anyway. If you love him, really love him, you should not be able to stop yourself from telling him.

Guys are not as good about saying a lot about how they feel.

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Originally Posted by Fr_Chuck

Let me see if you wait for a guy to say it, perhaps two years this fourth of July. If you don't fell free to talk to this perosn about any and everything, you don't really love him yet, if you are scared or worried about saying it, you don't have it.

Personal opinion anyway. If you love him, really love him, you should not be able to stop yourself from telling him.

guys are not as good about saying alot about how they feel.

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I do talk to Pete about everything & anything, I feel totally comfortable with him in any situation. I am not scared or worried about telling him I love - just I have listened to so many people chat about this type of thing in so many other threads and it kind of got me thinking whether I should wait or not?

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Originally Posted by Wildcat21

How long have you dated?

Is it lust and smitten?.....these feelings go away.

I think the first 6 months to a year you SHOW them how you feel - don't say it.

You say those 3 little words and things can change fast - sometimes for the better and a LOT of times for the worse.

IT's NOT a game....but it's not something NOT to take lightly - believe me.

I have had women feel 100 times more presure in the past when I said it. They eventually were gone.

My advice would be to wait - do nice things for him on occasion. Talk. Be there - hang out. He'll know.

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If you read my other threads then you would know that Pete and I have been together over 4 months. I know it does not seem like long, but it's not Lust and I am not smitten. I know the difference between being in Love and Lusting someone. I always show him how I feel and he does too.

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Originally Posted by DrJizzle

I dont see what the big deal is... if you love him, tell him. Its that simple. Ima guy so I may have different thoughts about this... but the first time you say "I love you" isnt a day you mark on your calendar, is it??

I wouldnt advise waiting for him to say it... seems to me that men will be more relucant than women to say the first "I love you."

If the FIRST time isnt as important to you than just the freedom to be able to say it when you feel it, just slip one in there sometime when he does something nice for you. If you say it and mean it in a "perfectly natural, normal" way (hehe.... The dad from the American Pie movies.... best dad on earth lol) then Im sure he will just go with the flow.

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I know it's not a "mark it on your calender" thing, and I really do want to just come out and say it. I hesitated because of some of the things I had read on here before. But I think things are starting to become clear now.

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Originally Posted by nwsflash

DJH from what your posting it sounds like this guy means alot to you. I see nothing wrong with you telling him that you LOVE HIM, it makes no diffrence if you say it first our he does.

And no your not stupid your just happy in love, don't keep those feelings all bottled up, let them out im sure from the way you say your both so close he won't be shocked.

Do you txt one another often ?? If so why not try and drop it out in the end of a txt "I LOV U" !! Ok its not face to face or personal but you will get a feeling of what he txt's you back. That just one idear any way....Hope all goes well for you both.

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You are pribably right. He probably knows deep down, and if I am honest I had to make the move in telling him I really liked him when we first got together, and he did say If I had not made the move then nothing would have ever happened. Lol

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Originally Posted by Jesushelper76

Maybe Valentines Day is that special day? Do not rush it. Let it be natural. If it is the right time you will know. Or if its not. You both show each other how much you care for each other. Everything else will come. Enjoy Valentines Day with your Hunny. Early Happy Valentines day!

Joe

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Thanks Joe. And a Happy Valentines day to you! Got anything special planned for your wife?

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Originally Posted by DJ 'H'

You are pribably right. He probably knows deep down, and if I am honest I had to make the move in telling him I really liked him when we first got together, and he did say If I had not made the move then nothing would have ever happened. lol

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LoL that sounds like a normal guy to me ;) I'm pleased things are going so well for you both... It sounds like you may be the 1st then to drop the "I LV U" Line! Don't stress at a guess he is probley be feeling the same.:D

Believe it or not Holly, I have nothing yet planned for my wife. Normally I am always ahead of the game. This year it has been hectic. I am sure I will come up with something real special. (:

Joe

Quote:

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Originally Posted by nwsflash

LoL that sounds like a normal guy to me ;) I'm pleased things are going so well for you both.....It sounds like you may be the 1st then to drop the "I LV U" Line !! Don't stress at a guess he is probley be feeling the same.:D

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You know I think you may be right. Actions do speak louder than words after all. Thank you so much for helpb & advice :)

I think Pete would not have a problem with it. Valentines day would be perfect if he could be the guy.